What’s Xi bringing everyone for Xmas?
I imagine a line of kids waiting to sit on Xi’s lap and he listen patiently to their requests. One by one, year after year, then one day, a very special child sits down, and they say to Xi “All I want for Christmas is the death of the US empire.” He closes his eyes and a tear runs down Xi’s face. Then he smiles and says quietly “I have been waiting patiently for this day young comrade.” As his eye begin to glow red, he stands up weilding a unbelievably large spoon.
Mass Christmas line
“Communists, choose your weapon! AK-47 or Large Spoon!?”
Both? Both. Both is good
Nice kids get books, naughty kids used to get coal but now get solar cells. Adults get new socks, as is customary. Chinese government officials will get their red envelopes, Western government officials their brown ones. Adrian Zenz gets a dictionary, Gordon Chang gets a calendar, whoever the British prime minister will be gets a clock, and Joe Biden gets pencil and paper to draw one
I would give Gordon Chang a magic 8 ball, Zenz a birth control pill, Biden some crayons, the british PM some fresh fruit (because they’ll be out before it goes bad)
whoever the British prime minister will be gets a clock
And lettuce.
Ximas*
XiBucks
I am hoping for a hammer, You cannot go wrong with a good hammer
Western Christmas fans will deny this
Also, that dude in the Santa getup looks pretty nice.
That’s the “official” Santa Claus from Rovaniemi in finnish folk costume complete with the huge snow shoes.
Xi and Comrade Claus after signing an agreement integrating the North Pole into the Belt and Road Initiative
High speed rail in North Pole dropping before High speed rail in USA
They’re replacing that outdated Polar Express with some cutting-edge Chinese maglev tech
Oh that is going in the Christmas cards this year for sure
Best upcoming dou collab album of 2022