**This post is fairly disturbing and also true, so if you are bothered by that maybe stray away.
::: spoiler spoiler
im composing this while in therapy and bullshitting (sharing as little as possible that is) my current therapist. I'm tired of therapy that makes no sense, every time I don't vibe with my therapist I try a new one, and it's the same white cis woman who hasn't had a mental health issue in their life. I'd rather have someone who I feel like I can actually spill my mind on.
Not to mention, damn me for being suicidal. Tried telling that to one of them once and all I got was DSS case on my ass and someone asking if I wanted to shoot queer people. Dumb ass i'm a fucking trans person do I look like a fucking mass shooter. Mofos got my weapons too. Didn't even help at all, they kept all my Tylenol in tact at my apartment, I guess they think people just shoot themselves.
The mental health "support" I have are all Cis, straight, Liberal, petit bourgeois people who'd rather ask if they can do a tarot reading than actually help with my depression. Not to mention what being neurodivergent has to do with it. Found out I have Autism and ADHD recently and all that've got is people dismissing me. My current therapist doesn't know two shits about autism, I mean they don't know two shits about queer people either so whatever, still though, I went to get a support needs based therapist and I got fuckin dismissed. Apparently I'm "High-Fuctioning" enough to not need fucking help. Whatever. (btw the person who diagnosed my ADHD and Autism says I need support.)
Anyway, don't worry for me if you are, I won't be offing myself
anytime soon. My birthday is coming up and I have a supportive helpful family. I also have a friend of mine, who funnily enough i've only known for a month and a half which is faaaaaaaaar better at helping than therapy. He's also struggles with the same exact things. I've been able to help and open up about mental, sexual, and general helth more than I could to a therapist in 1,000 years in less than two months