• SovereignState
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    9 months ago
    tldr it sucks but I mean the nature's cool

    The area I lived in is so backwoods it doesn’t have a true name, it borders a town and a village (yes, a village). They’re both about 20 minute drives in opposite directions.

    All along the highway from nowhere to somewhere, you’ll find abandoned gas stations and grocery stores overtaken by local foliage and critters of the dark. Cows every now and then with barbed wire fences cordoning off hundreds and hundreds of acres of land, usually owned by some disgustingly rich drunk old guy no one’s seen in years.

    In each town, everyone knows everyone. It was hard to stay anonymous even countywide – many, many times my last name indicated to others that they knew my family. Due to living in a borderland, I was given an option of two different high schools I could attend, in either direction. They’re both horrific, though I will say the one I attended had cool teachers. My graduating class had ~20 students in it, that being the entire senior class of my high school.

    It is a very different feeling to living in a city. I did not have neighbors less than a mile away. 90% of the roads I drove were not paved. I spent my childhood in extreme isolation. I used the internet to escape it, the very, very slow internet. It took me a month to download World of Warcraft, and I played the shit out of it, 500 ping or otherwise (I considered 200 was stable!!).

    We had DSL until maybe 2013. I grew up with a box computer, box TV, VHSs, all that old shit. Regular blackouts. School closed regularly because winter was utterly deadly – who is going to plow a dirt road? Summer was just as deadly for different reasons.

    We had a different relationship with guns. Gunshots were something you heard regularly, wherever you were, because folk were out hunting. It was normal. I remember, even, one time a classmate in 3rd grade brought (with his father) a deer he killed on the back of a pickup, and when he arrived he was holding his hunting rifle. This alarmed absolutely no one, including myself.

    We had prayer circles at school every Sunday. We’d gather around the flag and pray for the soldiers and shit. Pledge of allegiance every day, of course.

    Area was 99% white, and SOMEHOW the fuckers managed to get the black folk situated in the only part of that shithole that could be reasonably called a “ghetto”. How the fuck.

    I miss being able to fuck off into the woods and know that I was alone with nature. Nobody could mess with me because there was nobody. Nobody but the trees, squirrels, spiders and deer.

    Every other person has at least tried meth. I haven’t, but I’ve had the opportunity on multiple occasions. I’ve seen what that shit does to houses when people mix incorrectly. I’m good, I’ll stick with green. Cannabis can’t annihilate you quite so dramatically.

    There were homeless folk. Everybody knew them, but no one wanted to help them. I hate to say that I can’t really blame them as plenty of these folk would have murdered you for drug money. The others just woulda robbed you.


    Kind of a rambling mess and I apologize. I hope I painted something of a picture. If you have any specific questions I’d be delighted to share details of the bittersweet misery of rural life further.

    edit: addendum. These places were legally sundown towns in my mother’s lifetime.

    https://www.blackpast.org/african-american-history/sundown-towns/

    • Blinky_katt
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      9 months ago

      …sounds grim and surreal. Pretty sure I’ve read post-apocalyptic fiction with similar backgrounds :|

      • SovereignState
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        9 months ago

        I completely forgot the kicker. I was taught creationism in my science classes. 😄

        Tell my suburban friends that and they say shit like “I didn’t even know that still happened”, like creationism as “science” died in the 50s or 60s. Nah.

        Also taught that black folk were condemned to an eternity of slavery because Ham, ostensibly dark-skinned, witnessed his father Noah naked, while all the other races looked away.

        I would not recommend to any black folk to visit the rural midwest. They’ll tell you how not-racist they are right before they fucking lynch you. The cops will be there, assisting the lynchers. Klan flyers left on doorsteps (my family got one). NAACP put out a travel advisory for Missouri, the only entire state they’ve ever done that for. I don’t blame them at all.

        • DamarcusArt
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          9 months ago

          It still blows my mind that while these places aren’t “officially” sundown towns, they still are for all practical purposes.

    • cfgaussian
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      9 months ago

      Thank you for sharing and i hope you live in better conditions now.

      • SovereignState
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        9 months ago

        Thank you. I live in a relatively small city in a different state now.

        Incredibly, there’s shit to do! People to meet! I prefer it so much more. The quickest way to kill misanthropy, for me, has been to meet people. The kindness of utter strangers baffles me sometimes – I’m not used to it.

        Only problem is, the gunshots I hear every other day aren’t so innocuous. I live in the hood, the ghetto, whatever you wanna call it, but it’s my community now, you know? Care about these folk. Roads are all paved but still barely drivable. Least I can walk down the street to get my groceries if I want (and not have to drive 45 minutes to the nearest Walmart…)

        • Shrike502
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          9 months ago

          the gunshots I hear every other day

          Don’t think I’ve ever heard live gunshots in my city. Even in the 90’s, when the country was a bleeping warzone. Only ever heard some in the countryside, from far away (hunters or plinkers). And you are saying it’s a regular occurrence?

          • SovereignState
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            9 months ago

            Moved into my new place last month. Heard shots three times. One time it was just brap brap brap. Another time sounded like two. Heard a fucking shootout maybe two weeks ago, maybe 8 or 9.

            Some folk mistake fireworks for gunshots, and I guess it’s possible that I was just hearing kids playing with M80s or something. But I know folk who’ve been shot, know folk whose family have been murdered in drive-bys, and I’m familiar with the sound of gunfire. You won’t even hear about it on the news.

    • DamarcusArt
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      9 months ago

      Sounds a lot like rural Australia, though we have fewer gunshots. People usually go hunting with bows here, because hunting rifles are somewhat hard to get.