Hallucinations, demonic visions, trying to figure out what I said, did or happened and what hasn’t, paranoia and doing weird stuff to stop weirder stuff. I have other stuff with it too but I’ll give some examples, one time I felt like I had a tail like imagine having a 3rd leg behind you a few centimeters away just being there and wiggling or something, another one I one time I jumped to lay on my bed and during that air time I had visions of me falling through a black void with satanic figures floating around that felt like it laster for eternity, another instance is one time I completely left a friend I had for something they said then later I remembered the friend never said anything like that and I just thought he said it and I don’t even know what he said, also small stuff while going through daily life like leaves turning into ratoid things and moving or seeing faces get distorted to the point that you don’t recognize your own. I am not sure if all of these are schizophrenia stuff but I got diagnosed with it 2 years ago around this time of year
I was thinking around about the satanic visions bits and I think I cracked it, https://youtu.be/oneOy2VkmSY this vid scared me so much as a kid that I would cry so hard when someone scares me, my mom used tgis to get me to do chores or something and with everything in life feeling like a chore and being stuck on bed doing nothing awakened it or something I’m no expert
In my limited reading of psychology textbooks, they’ve found schizophrenia usually manifests in the early 20s (if it doesn’t, there’s a close to 0% chance you’re schizophrenic) and seems to be biological, i.e. DNA-based. IIRC people with schizophrenic family members are more likely to be schizophrenic themselves.
This sounds absolutely awful and debilitating, and I wish only the best for you moving forward. But having had some experience with the treatment of schizophrenic people, is it alright if I ask if you’ve been taking medication for this? It can be a night and day difference between symptoms and overall mental wellbeing, especially when coupled with therapy. I’m not sure of your exact situation, but it should be a good thing to work towards in terms of treatment. You can live your best life comrade.
Please don’t give up medication. I’ve met schizophrenic people whom you would never know unless they told you and they said they owed it all to their medication. I can’t imagine going through the hallucinations you described, if medication helps you need to take it.
Your family doesn’t go through what you do, it’s frankly none of their business how you manage your own problems. Based on how it looks on them, from what I can tell? Only you know what’s best for you.
Please do not listen to them, this is an incredibly debilitating weight to carry on your back through your life, and this is not a problem that can simply be “pushed through”. They will most likely never understand the true nature of what is happening to you, and you cannot let that harm you. By not taking the medication your life will only be made progressively worse, which will lead to extremely high chances of co-morbid illnesses and suicide.
Again, I am unsure of your exact situation and opportunities, but I will urge you with all my heart to reach out to medical services and medical professionals in order to receive treatment for this. I promise that it will improve your life significantly, and you can leave the majority of these symptoms in the past like bad memories.
Hallucinations, demonic visions, trying to figure out what I said, did or happened and what hasn’t, paranoia and doing weird stuff to stop weirder stuff. I have other stuff with it too but I’ll give some examples, one time I felt like I had a tail like imagine having a 3rd leg behind you a few centimeters away just being there and wiggling or something, another one I one time I jumped to lay on my bed and during that air time I had visions of me falling through a black void with satanic figures floating around that felt like it laster for eternity, another instance is one time I completely left a friend I had for something they said then later I remembered the friend never said anything like that and I just thought he said it and I don’t even know what he said, also small stuff while going through daily life like leaves turning into ratoid things and moving or seeing faces get distorted to the point that you don’t recognize your own. I am not sure if all of these are schizophrenia stuff but I got diagnosed with it 2 years ago around this time of year
I was thinking around about the satanic visions bits and I think I cracked it, https://youtu.be/oneOy2VkmSY this vid scared me so much as a kid that I would cry so hard when someone scares me, my mom used tgis to get me to do chores or something and with everything in life feeling like a chore and being stuck on bed doing nothing awakened it or something I’m no expert
In my limited reading of psychology textbooks, they’ve found schizophrenia usually manifests in the early 20s (if it doesn’t, there’s a close to 0% chance you’re schizophrenic) and seems to be biological, i.e. DNA-based. IIRC people with schizophrenic family members are more likely to be schizophrenic themselves.
1 uncle on mom’s side,2 on father’s and 5 cousins on both sides
And do these visions bother you? How do you become aware what you see is not “real” in the sense that it is not a shared experience with others?
Do I have to answer?
This sounds absolutely awful and debilitating, and I wish only the best for you moving forward. But having had some experience with the treatment of schizophrenic people, is it alright if I ask if you’ve been taking medication for this? It can be a night and day difference between symptoms and overall mental wellbeing, especially when coupled with therapy. I’m not sure of your exact situation, but it should be a good thing to work towards in terms of treatment. You can live your best life comrade.
I stopped taking them 2 years ago because my family doesn’t want to think of me like that
Please don’t give up medication. I’ve met schizophrenic people whom you would never know unless they told you and they said they owed it all to their medication. I can’t imagine going through the hallucinations you described, if medication helps you need to take it.
Your family doesn’t go through what you do, it’s frankly none of their business how you manage your own problems. Based on how it looks on them, from what I can tell? Only you know what’s best for you.
Please do not listen to them, this is an incredibly debilitating weight to carry on your back through your life, and this is not a problem that can simply be “pushed through”. They will most likely never understand the true nature of what is happening to you, and you cannot let that harm you. By not taking the medication your life will only be made progressively worse, which will lead to extremely high chances of co-morbid illnesses and suicide.
Again, I am unsure of your exact situation and opportunities, but I will urge you with all my heart to reach out to medical services and medical professionals in order to receive treatment for this. I promise that it will improve your life significantly, and you can leave the majority of these symptoms in the past like bad memories.
I’ll try what I can
I wish you luck with that. You can make it through this, you’ve got this.