I’ve been languishing in my comfort zone. Continuing to do so will have terrible effects for me. To quote Marx, I “[have] become a monster, a huge mass of flesh and fat, and [am] barely capable of walking any more.” Ever since the pandemic started I’ve become a terminally online antisocial weirdo who barely ever leaves my room, let alone the house.
Of course, in addition to the damage this does to my personal life, it also makes me non - potentially even counter - revolutionary. As someone who wants to be a communist instead of just some internet poisoned middle class dilettante, I don’t know how I can be expected to jeopardize the comfort of my parasitic labor aristocratic class position when I can’t even get out of my comfort zone enough to go outside, eat real food, and do even the barest minimum of light exercise.
start engaging with your community -> take your dog for a long walk around your neighborhood and greet your neighbors, make small talk with other dog owners, etc…
join a club -> it can be anything, a musical instrument class, a language class, any group sport activity, even the gym. it has to be a presencial activity tho.
these 2 things have helped me a lot these past years, i am still very online but my mental health is much better and i actually feel my improvement as a person. you have to put in the effort, in the current society if you don’t do it yourself no one will do it for you. we communists have to be strong so we can help others in worse conditions.
@CannotSleep420@lemmygrad.ml Also besides language classes, a lot of even smaller colleges (or just random community centers) will have art classes, stuff like painting, pottery, ravelry, smithing, etc. I had a lot of fun doing a painting one in my last city, and hung out with people after class a lot too.
Community centers will also potentially have things like adult sports leagues (soccer, frisbee, etc), yoga classes, zumba, etc. Def worth going to one and checking out what programs they have.
Bigger cities will have various hipstery-adjacent-activities like roller-skating clubs too which can be fun, and at least have younger people.
I’ve also been stagnating since covid and really need to find more social outlets. My main interest is music (i play piano) but I haven’t found a good way to find people to jam with outside of work.
join a club -> . . . a musical instrument class
Are there more-social avenues for this? I’ve been receiving instruction in an instrument for a little bit because circumstances mean it’s pretty cheap for me, but it’s also only barely social and I wish I had other novices to do a terrible job of playing alongside.
There is a app I’ve used to find band mates; https://apps.apple.com/us/app/vampr-find-artists-gigs/id1069819177
Its sort of like tinder but instead of trying to date you’re looking for a drummer lol.
Alright, but what if I completely suck?
Find other people who completely suck, plenty of people on there do.
Quickest way to stop sucking is to play with at least one other person, it forces you to play in time to someone else and teaches you what live music is all about, playing off each other. Also for motivation you will actually have some tangible goals for practice (learn these songs)
The “Find other people who completely suck [and want to play with other people who suck]” is my sticking point here. I understand that I want people near my level and that actually playing with musicians is very helpful (I had a brief period where I could do this and it’s the best I’ve been). The finding them is the part I don’t get.
Hit them up on that app or join a discord for your local area and ask around in it. Let people know your expectations and skill level, there will always be someone out there looking for the exact same thing as you.
It sounds like the main issue is overcoming depression or something very similar, so framing it in that less-moralizing way might help you take a constructive approach and also find resources on the internet.
I don’t know what the climate is like where you are, but I think a really good way to start could be (weather permitting) to just take a walk around the block (or if you live in a rural area, walk a ~1/4 mile). If you want to keep going, you can, but if not then at least you reinforced the habit of going outside and doing something, and it will probably feel nice once you do it.
Disclaimer: This is in part something that I wish I had heard some time ago, so it might be too personal and miss the mark at points.
Ever since the pandemic started I’ve become a terminally online antisocial weirdo who barely ever leaves my room, let alone the house.
If you live with family, you might find leaving the house easier than just the room. Grab some headphones, put on an audiobook, podcast or just music and try to take small walks. If you’re not physically fit right now, you’ll probably not get very far, and that’s okay.
I don’t know what kind of food is generally sold in the US, but try to find a reasonably distant restaurant that sells some okay but still tasty food. My Brazilian analogue would be some rice-and-beans-based meal, you can probably find something similar to your taste, but as a rule of thumb prefer boiled to fried. You’ll also not be able to suddenly become a great healthy cook right away, and that’s okay.
An important part of doing unpleasant but healthy things, is that they’re usually only unpleasant in the beginning. They’ll eventually become comfortable too. Starting is usually the hardest bit.
But honestly the most important part is using your material conditions as a tool rather than a cudgel to beat yourself up. Frankly, if you’re not able to do revolutionary work right now you’ll probably not be able to do much counter-revolutionary work either, so that’s not something you should worry about. But also, if you have money to spare, use it on yourself to make yourself feel better. Therapy, counselling, non-free group classes are all things you can do to make your life actually better which are not “parasitic”. Make full use of the tools that have been given to you without shame, as if you had ever had that much of a choice in receiving them in the first place.
Also a small recommendation, have you listened to the “It’s not just in your head” podcast by Harriet Fraad? It talks a lot about the relation between activism and mental health. You can pick some specific episodes that talk about things you most immediately care about, be it material or mental, and see if it is worth it.
Mildly unrelated but it would be nice to do some rebuilding at !mentalhealth@lemmygrad.ml, because I bet a lot of people here and on the Bear would have use for it.
Join an org. Food not Bombs is usually what I tell people to start with, they’re fuckin everywhere, and usually pretty cool. At least it will get your ear to the ground as to what’s going on in the area. You will be in good company, I promise.
Like others said, try starting small. Meet up with a friend at a public place. If that’s not an option, you can join a gym, maybe ask someone to spot for you for exercises that you need help with. And if someone looks experienced, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Most people are more than happy to help you out, after all, it’s sort of a compliment in a way. I also suggest going for walks or getting lunch or a drink from a place you like. Over time you can build a rapport with the employees or other customers. Other than that, applying for different jobs is a great way to switch things up in life and meet new people. TL;DR do things that interest you that you never did before or rarely do. Check out what you like. You’re (I assume) young and have plenty of time to see what interests you and what would motivate you to go out more. And take your time, there is no official timeline for any of this
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Treating the internet like a cocktail drug addiction has been good for me. Don’t try and quit xanax, heroin, alcohol and meth at the same time. Start by just trying to quit one, suffer the withdrawals, and don’t let one of your other vices grow worse to compensate. They say of course the best way to kick a bad habit is to replace it with a good one, but sometimes when you’re kicking heroin all you you can do for a few days is vomit and shit yourself. However, when you are not immobilized by withdrawal, doing something to shake things up in life is paramount, it forces you into an unfamiliar mindset where you will be more pliable to new changes.
Small victories are the key, as is persistence in the face of small failures. Building a habit of trying is more important at first than building an actual successful habit. Keep streaks as long as you can but don’t self flagellate if you stumble or fall.
I think light exercise is a great place to start, you will in a short time frame feel a little better and, if kept up, it will slowly snowball to positively affect all your other ventures.
Everybody works different of course. Me personally, when I was battling depression for so long, it helped to externalize it. You can see it as capitalism as an entity trying to render you, a valuable asset to socialism, inert, but concocting a pernicious psychological system to keep you trapped and hopefully kill you entirely. The stakes in essence are that high, no? There are other frameworks too; for example nowadays I have a sort of imaginary drill sergeant in my head who speaks none to nicely to me, and I also find myself using spite and revenge as a motivator. I find it key to force myself to do things even when I hate them and don’t necessarily believe they will bear fruit.
Whatever way ends up working best for you, just know that ultimately you won’t know until you start throwing some spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks.
Don’t wait for the perfect answer! Put down this shit phone, close all the screens, go take a walk, and a longer one than you think you can do! Force it!
By any means necessary.
And good luck to you and anyone else on your redemption arc :)
Get on the bicycle and explore.
You can also volunteer at neighborhood community services: e.g. a lot of older people need help with taking care of gardening or other strenuous chores.
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You watered the brain with theory, now let it grow with excersize.
