I remember a few years ago when I felt like the world was at my feet. Bought my first car, went to lots of parties, toured around the country with musicians, living my best life. I was broke as fuck at one point but I couldn’t care less. I felt like everything was going to be okay and I enjoyed every single day.

Now I get anxious whenever I buy a bag of chips or a drink at the grocery store to enjoy my weekend night with my gf. Which is weird because by all metrics I’m doing better than years ago, with a job, my own place, a partner and whatnot. I shouldn’t have financial stress and feel anxious but I just do. I’m going to get a nice, new and bigger appartment but my first reaction is to get anxious and thank: what am I doing? How am I going to do this?

Maybe covid, Ukraine and all other commie shit had a bigger impact on my mental wellbeing than I’d like to admit.