It was the sheer number of anti-colonialists in the mid-20th century who fought imperialism using Marxism-Leninism as a way to approach politics. I was an anarchist for a good long while, and the great examples of anarchist success always were cases where there was significant capitalist retrenchment, or outright victory by fascism. M-L revolutionaries, on the other hand, shrugged the yoke of imperialism off the backs of much of the colonial world, and in some cases rose to be powers in their own right to counter imperial capitalist powers.

M-L’s focus as an ideological school in self-criticism and a recognition that different conditions require different responses and strategies just made sense. The sweeping manifestos I had read from anarchists laid down ideas about how society would be organized “after the revolution”, waving away the challenges of entrenched capitalist power, and ultimately usually turned into some form of federation of communes. They were inflexible about how they viewed the future, whereas Marxism-Leninism is more of a toolkit, not a dogma.

To me Marxism-Leninism had a history of working, even if the outcomes are not always perfect. Anarchism did not have that track record, and frankly I am beginning to get to the point where I want something that can win, because I can’t imagine living under these conditions and the capitalist regime the rest of my life.

I’m still learning theory, but that’s what made me change from anarchism.

Various things. Most importantly, coming to the realization that a lot of the Anarchists I knew and the groups for Anarchists I knew about were very strictly anti-communist, and that anti-communism made them hyper-willing to trust western propaganda.

There are other things, Anarchist groups being filled with lifestylists and anti-intellectualism, Anarchists in my life seeming to have absolutely no plan for how to organize and fight the revolution they pined so hard for, how shitty the Anarchists I had been learning from got towards me when I told them I branched out from Anarchist literature. ETC. Also, on the flip side, how welcoming and informative Marxists often were. How connected Marxists were to real-world issues, and the relationship between those issues and the disillusionment of workers, etc.

Or, or sum. How shitty and hypocritical the Anarchists were, and how legitimately wholesome and pointedly on-top-of-things Marxists were.