[CW: Transphobia]
As a non-binary person, I now have to operate under the assumption that any trans person I meet has a good chance of hating my guts simply because of my gender identity (ironic). I really fucking hate that I cannot undo this mindset because of how common transmedicalism and enbyphobia in the trans community has become.
I can’t even see a post on social media that says something like “Trans Rights!!!” and not feel uncomfortable because my initial reaction has become “Does that include me, though? Do you support my rights?”. I will always identify as trans, but I’m heavily frightened by the possibility that transphobic attacks I experience are not just gonna be from mostly cis people.
Now, at every fucking turn, I have to ponder if I belong in any trans spaces or not. After going through harsh amounts of abusive transphobia from cis people, having trans people go out of their way to exclude me has done more to make me feel alone than anything else, and it’s absolutely not what I need right now.
i had to stop talking to a friend because they couldn’t stop spouting transmed talking points despite being nb (and claiming to no longer be a transmed) themselves. they had a lot of self loathing going on and i hope they’re ok, but i couldn’t deal with constantly hearing them policing who’s allowed to be trans and the way they’d talk about their own gender
transmedicalism is a scourge and i can promise that the mod team here is always going to do our best to avoid any of it from infecting c/traaa, and if you ever notice anything do not hesitate to call it out
The fact that trans people, including me, are so under attack by transphobic legislation, and transmeds still want to exclude me and hate me really is messing with me mentally. Transgender people are already viewed as being on such a low end of society’s hierarchy, so for me to be going through the exact same thing as them, and then being told “Yeah, but you don’t deserve any support, recognition, or acceptance because [reasons].” actually makes me feel like such an outcast and a freak that it truly emphasizes how abhorrent it is to be this way. There is no reason for me to carry on if I’m so disgusting, gross, freakish, and abnormal honestly. Genuine satisfaction sounds extremely unattainable in a world so binary that even transgender people hate me for being this way. I never wanted to be broken.
i’m so sorry. you don’t deserve to feel that way, no one does. i know my words don’t mean much, but i cannot emphasize how much the things they say are untrue and that you deserve love and acceptance just as much as i or anyone else does
The world was never binary, don’t let them lie to you with their illusions.
Its part of splitting the community and alienating its members so we’re weaker when asking for our rights, they obviously did it during red scares and found out said tactics worked perfectly on minority groups.
I had the same experience except I had to switch schools altogether because the school admins wouldn’t get them to fuck off, I credit them with being the reason I eventually ended up dropping out of highschool altogether.
Transmedicalism seems to be part of an overall phenomenon of trans assimilationism which is very annoying in even it’s more harmless forms
At its best it would be understood that every person defying the assigned gender binary is someone who is helping make society less restrictive, breaking apart the chains that constrain us all.
This is true, and you know what? I literally just finished this read that conveys this exact point. The issue is that there are numerous amounts of binary trans people who have so little awareness to this detail that they’ll push me down for… not being the “right kind of gender deviant”? As far as I’m concerned society and the oppressive systems reinforcing cisheteronormativity knows no such thing. I don’t even know exactly what the problem is at this point. It’s seems so irrational that I can’t even begin to fathom why they hate me so much when I’m literally… the same as them when it all comes down to the grand scheme of things. It’s about as sensible as colorism is for black people. Imagine being a black person who only supports liberation from racial oppression for black people who are specifically dark-skinned or black people who are specifically light-skinned. Imagine doing this and not understanding how it looks to the systems that uphold white privilege. Don’t you understand how absurd it sounds? Enbyphobic transgender people do not.
You definitely do belong in trans spaces because you are trans. Trans meds are not our allies
We will never tolerate transmedicalism on here.
And I thank you for being so vigilant in fighting against exclusion, bigotry, and hate within our community. It really makes me sad that the notion of a trans community, especially an online one, being universally opposed to transmedicalism seems so rare to me.
We appreciate it. This isn’t even something that any of the mods on the team even felt the need to discuss in our Matrix chat, every mod responding to this is responding individually. We’re just against transmedicalism on here because the only logical conclusion of transmedicalism is “don’t come out until you fully know yourself (you will never fully know yourself) and have thousands of dollars to spend on surgery”. It’s inherently a bad idea.
You know what I use as my “hormone meds” right now? An anti-psychotic that kills T production and gives me a minor boost in estrogen and progesterone, but nothing major, just enough to keep me from losing it. We all have shit that could be used to invalidate our identity as trans people, but isn’t getting over that the whole point of the trans journey? To get over ourselves and our own physical/mental limitations that keep us from fully being ourselves. The idea of giving two shits about someone’s medical history for no good reason is ridiculous.
When I was 16 I was helping organize groups for trans kids and trans teens to meet up in our state and one of the most stressful things I have dealt with during that time was the rise of transmedicalism. I would have kids coming to me crying about the horrible things some truscum kid said to them every week or two, it never stopped no matter how many slideshow presentations and discussions we had.
The indoctrination these kids went through because of piece of shit transmedicalists on YouTube was nearly impenetrable and nearly always accompanied a careening dissent into right wing politics. The only option was to go over their heads and contact their parents and if that didn’t work we’d just have to ban them from the groups.
I think this is what I’m worried about besides now being 30 and debating doing hrt and potentially losing out on gains that I’ve yet to put consistent effort into getting… (Lazy[probably more like depressed]) And not passing, not in a traditional sense, not super concerned with looking like a woman, but more or less want to be somewhere in the middle and pretty / handsome and have people have a (?) pop up over their head when trying to decipher my gender. It all makes me wonder if I’m still cis albeit confused, a Russian nesting egg, or very closeted trans. I get that it’s a spectrum I guess I’m just not certain where I fit on it. And I’m broke so I can’t afford any ‘professional’ guidance and I am not a very social person so I wouldn’t know any trans inclusive people IRL who could give me guidance much less a trans person.
The catch 22 of transmedicalism: they hate non-binary people because they’re under the assumption that they’re inherently non-dysphoric or inherently do not medically transition, but they also hate it when non-binary people do have dysphoria and do medically transition.
I literally know this because I’ve had transmeds tell me that I should be legally barred and restricted from continuing my medical transition just because I’m non-binary, which is really fucking sad and pathetic for a trans person to say, even more than your typical conservative Christian Republican saying it.
No matter how you look at it, truscum hold the horrendous “eNbies Make us Look LiKE A joke!!!” take, even though conservative cishet transphobes don’t give a fuck and already deem them a joke. The lack of awareness in how evil, harmful, hypocritical, and just outright fucking stupid they are is super fucking disappointing.
Ok. So what I’m hearing is I’m just super in my head about feeling like a trans minstrel act because I’m trying to fit a cis normative conception of transness that’s been adopted by most trans people because that’s all they’ve been given and or what ground was conceded to them. Imo obviously. I’m not well read besides memes and random articles so if someone wants to correct me please do. Basically John Snow here.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to blend in with cis people and be stealth and just live out your life as a typical cis man/cis woman would. The problem that comes with that is people forcing and pushing assimilationist rhetoric on trans people who don’t want to do that, going as far to support legally gatekeeping them because of the logic “If they don’t want to fit the typical gender-conforming, assimilationist, binary trans narrative that cishet people shit out, then they should be forced to live out their life as cis instead!”. It’s disgusting. No transgender person, even these diehard simps for cisheteronormative patriarchy, benefits from assimilationist rhetoric, whether they realize it or not.
Yes. I half unfortunately fall within the spectrum of “what trans people should look like” so that feels insanely gross when people talk to me like “”“one of the good ones”“”
I may be vocal about my identity/origins with people, but my mostly “passing” means that I’ll have fewer of those interactions, and fewer people will know they’ve just interacted with a trans person and that it was nice. In a sense, I feel as though the burden of education is then involuntarily shifted to people who don’t fit into the traditional gender binary, so I feel like I should thank you for being visible, though it’s not really a choice. I hate that it puts y’all in more danger.
Peace and love 💕
You fucking do belong, and I make a point to include non-binary and other trans people that don’t feel medical transitioning is for them. I hate hearing people mock non-binary identities, and genuinely feel excluded and afraid as well when people speak as such. I see it as fascistic and intentional stratification/division of the LGBTQIA+ community that will only leave its proponents with zero people defending them when the fascists run out of non-binary people to oppress.
I’m sorry you’re being faced with these viewpoints, especially from trans people, who ought to recognize and help their own. I made friends with a trans woman who said some horrible shit about enbies and I haven’t hung out with her since. I did try talking her down, but to no avail. Sorry for rambling a bit, my emotions about this are rather tumultuous.
I don’t fully understand what transmedicalism is, but what I do know offhand is that it’s a bunch of nonsense. Anything that puts gates up to inclusion and simply is that nefarious is quite frankly unwelcome in my eyes. And, after a cursory google search of what exactly it is, it seems like this attitude probably helped delay my egg cracking for so long. Fuck everything about transmedicalism. That shit can go to hell.
