I just came from failing at my exam. The one subject I studied the most, the one I sacrificed the other subjects for. I panicked and I wasn’t able to do simple math. Nothing ever works. I’m living in almost complete poverty, don’t even have money for toilet paper, eat basically rice every day, I can’t even wash my clothes. My mother has kind of told me to fuck off and I’m supposed to go and live with my drug addict of a father, I need to get a shitty job, I don’t know if I have the mental equilibrium to do both a job and university. I have nothing. I have no one. I need to kill myself and stop pretending I can go forward, it only ever gets worse.