If you hang out with lgbt people more, it gets easier. It’s obvious when people are distant/outside looking in and there’s a longing there. If those feelings aren’t healthy then people will notice. It’s best to learn as much as you can from people so that you can see them for who they really are and not just how you perceive them. It opens the door to being friends too! 😊

Also, nonbinary topics are something I think you could benefit from researching. It sounds like you might be nonbinary, and the enby community is huge, diverse, and has a million different ways of seeing gender. One of those might be what you’re looking for.