My patron saint is Mossberg.
Had a gun pulled on me by a Black cop because I was doing my cardio in a public park without a beanie, toque, or durag with which to obscure the Afrikan texture and density of my hair, and some old white suburbanite got all Becky and called the police bc she “didn’t recognize me”. I’ve lived in this fuckin neighborhood for seven years, but “she didn’t recognize me”. That’s okay tho; I don’t leave the house unstrapped anymore. We’ll see if that shit happens again.
Proved to me that whoever a pig used to be before they became a cop doesn’t fuckin matter. All the pig is is ‘blue’ from then on; and it had the secondary lesson of ‘you are not what race YOU think you are; you are whatever the police radios home that you are’-- which makes me just as Black as any member of my mother’s side of the family.
Occasionally. They’re the type to hardline stick-in-the-mud at certain discourse points no matter how often they tell me they get something I’ve talked on before. Feels like I’m wasting my time. Feels like I’m wasting my breath. Feels like the garden-variety Amerikan is unsalvagable. Feels like within the next three years, I’ll have been denounced to somebody for ‘sedition’.
Funny enough, I consider cryptofascism as a few degrees worse than just oligarchic capitalism; and ever since I saw all those Sonnenrads, Wolfsengels, and Swastikas on a bunch of slavic europeans(read: foreign crackers), I haven’t been able to be convinced they’re not a bunch of nazis.
Are Amerikan exceptionalists about to try and tell me that Russia edited those insignias on in post? That they’ve got a bunch of little TMZ-assed image editors sitting in the back of the Kremlin, flawlessly image-editing hundreds, maybe thousands of photos, nullifying their original sources, and pushing out spin propaganda with the edits?
Y’know, I find it ‘funny’ in that ‘excessively-loud side-eye’ kind of way that every square in the Comic Sans “workers” basically-a-denigration field are all women in this meme. Like, what’s this creator really tryna say? Is it that their view of ‘real work’ is only specific fields, or also that they don’t consider women workers either?
And it gets worse when you find the China denigration further back in their catalog of blog posts. I might believe that it is patently impossible for a meaningful revolt to occur in the imperial core until every support strut the parasite state props itself upon is collapsed and irreparable; but I can’t cosign someone deliberately carrying RFA water.
In what world is it sensible that those of us with the most to lose should be expected to correct the path of those who perpetrated against us, at significant mental, spiritual, and sometimes even physical cost, people who will perpetrate against us again at the drop of a hat? Do we live in two different nations?
I want to believe that you’re better than what I’ve seen the White Left to be; but it sounds distinctly like you’re saying “no, you must exist within the line of fire”, and that’s really pissing me off right about now.
There isn’t enough money in the world that I could be paid to try and deworm the brains of hundreds of millions of settler-born hwhites, I’m sorry. It ain’t happening. There’s too many settlers, and not enough colonized opfor of any stripe, nowhere near enough subjects-of-empire to actually have a mass against the settlers. If this is the case, then how is it possible for the First World to be the first place the chain breaks?
Careerwise, your best option is to not live in the USA. Yeah…
And people wonder why I’m constantly having to talk myself out of a rope, lmao. Born here, disabled, and mentally ill; and I’m supposed to concentrate on college work in a field where the odds of me getting hired remote(when I’m medically ‘discouraged’ from driving) are about as long me winning the Powerball? It’s a laugh riot, except I don’t find it funny anymore
In the same trench as you, homie. I’m not even gonna bullshit you-- my faith in the imperial core’s been dead since COVID first kicked off. If anything, I’m closer to nihilism right now than any other low point of my life. I don’t believe in the crackers my living situation is surrounded by; one of them called the cops on me for going for a walk in a neighborhood I lived in for a decade just a couple months ago. We’re fucked; there’s a chance the Actually Existing Socialist states won’t be near as badly, though. They’ll make it through, at least.
That’s what I keep telling myself, at least.
…Yeah, from experience, this is an awful idea; 'cause that was how I was raised, and I didn’t manage to start unfucking my mental state and transitioning from dirtbaggery until I was like 22 or 23. Ten years of ghoulish reactionary bullshit is a VERY hard habit to break, especially when they occurred through your formative years.
tl;dr parents need to actually parent, and keep their young away from poison like what exists on the internet now.
It’s 2023, and the sense of being trapped has intensified. Nowhere I’d actually be able to put my applications development/applied sciences degree to use would let me emigrate without stupid amounts of money I’ll never have in my life; but… God, you can’t even pay me to consider dying side-by-side with the average Amerikan ghoul anymore. I constantly ask whose sick idea it was for me to born in the belly of the Great Satan, and constantly think about routes out. I am so, fucking, tired.
thank you based god
/uj On the level tho, you’re right on the money about where the issues regarding appropriation of AAVE is concerned. Are the odds high that you’d get an eyeroll, a roof-click, and a shake of the head out of some Black folk hearing it leave you? Yeah; but that’s more a bias kneejerk reaction borne from thousands of incidents of say, folk like who you see on r/kanye or r/hiphopheads trying to speak what they think is ‘fluent’ AAVE while being white as skim and living in a gated suburb.
Considering Xi got the Pentagon to mald over a weather balloon, I can think of at least ten world leaders who’d like that seat just for a day.