A condom made in the USSR. Date of manufacture: September 1955. Circled in red - “Length: 49,5 centimeters”
What it says on the top: “Dear monarchists, please present your ugly pie-holes for inspection” (that’s the closest I came up with trying to translate this masterpiece without its oomph getting lost)
“It’s a good thing I don’t know what a cm is, or I’d feel violently insecure right now!”
You can’t know, because you know freedom units and in the soviet union there was no freedom