I hear “No problem” far more often.
Years ago, I had to do customer service training for a job, and one thing they said is to always say “you’re welcome” instead of “no problem”, because some people think “no problem” is rude. But I think it’s a generational thing, and it’s kind of the opposite with younger folks.
Nothing is worse than other options though like Chic fil a’s mandated “my pleasure”
When a chic-fil-a worker hits you with that, you gotta one-up them with “No! The pleasure is all mine!” and then hit the gas, peeling out cackling because you stole that pleasure motherfuckaaaaah.
(Or better, don’t go to chic-fil-a)
I told a bartender “oh, the pleasure was all ours!” one time just sort of joking around and he said “you have no idea how much”. I wasn’t really sure how to take that.
I would be wondering what I did to make his job more difficult.
Yeah, I saw a few intepretations:
- he was joking
- he hates his job and all of the customers
- he hated us in particular (there’d be no reason why though, my gf and I showed up, had a couple glasses of wine, didn’t complain that one had gnats in it, got rained on on the patio, went inside and paid and I had just finished tipping 25-30%)
OH YEAH I"M GETTING PLEASURE TOO!
I think we collectively decided that “you’re welcome” doesn’t make sense. Welcome to what??
you’re whale cum
to impose on me duh
Maybe it’s “you are welcome (to ask me for help/favors, as I am neutral to the task. I might even enjoy it.)”
And “it’s not a problem (for me to do what you asked me to do; we have now both acknowledged that I have done something to help you that was not organic to me, but now we can move past it with no further conversation.)”
I bet “no problem” to some people is like seeing someone wear a T-shirt to church. They’d really prefer it if you would put on a suit and tie, even though the purpose of both are the same (cover my body when away from home because that is our current social agreement), because a T-shirt is disrespectful.
Also everyone sucks, it is a problem, and you are not welcome.
I had to do one communucation trainung where the trainer saud that saying “no problem” should not be used, because it implies there might’ve been a problem. I was not convinced though.
Then “your welcome” implies you might not be welcome. Seems like either both work or both are problematic, he can’t have it both ways.
Agreed. Might also be because “problem” is a word with negative conotation? Idk, I don’t see a problem (hah) myself
Wow. facepalm The words literally say there’s no problem, and yet it somehow implies there is a problem? Talk about overthinking what someone is saying.
This is why I often hate neurotypical communication styles. The world would be a lot more straightforward if people just said what they meant. Jesus fucking Christ on a motorbike…
… would be quite a sight to see. Although if He can do all those other miracles, I guess fucking Himself on a motorcycle wouldn’t be impossible. So I guess it’s just a straightforward statement on your part.
............I ship it.
Then why are people tripping about saying “you’re welcome”?
I’m sorry; what are you asking?
Someone said that to me just the other day! That saying “no problem” implies there might be a problem. Crazy. I’m thinking of switching to “well it was quite an imposition on my time and energy to help you out, especially given you’re not paying me, but I’ll let it slide this time because you seem like an ok person and I’m in a good mood” just to annoy them.
I think a lot of younger generation, myself included, prefer casual responses, conflating professionalism with being rude, slimy, or otherwise malintentioned
I’ve been making an effort to use “happy to help” at work, instead of “no problem” because I was also informed it’s a generational thing.
For paid service I like the simple “of course” recognizing that is what I’m here for and it’s normal. No faux generosity nor implication of a tolerated imposition.
But what about “No problem at all”?
I see “no problem” as nicer. If I say that, I’m expressing that I really don’t mind, and there’s no need to thank me. No problem, as in I had no problem with doing this thing
“You’re welcome” feels more like “I appreciate you thanking me, because I went out of my way to do this”, if that makes any sense
Huh, to me, YW is much more gracious and positive that you’re happy to do it, while NP is more like “it was a tolerable burden”.
Though for paid service I don’t like expected faux enthusiasm. I think “of course” is classy and not demeaning then, meaning “it’s what I’m here for”.
In German, “you’re welcome” means “gern geschehen” which can be translated back to “I did it gladly”. So yea, I also think YW is very positive
Duolingo taught me “wilkommen” for “welcome.” Is that used IRL?
No, not in the context of “you’re welcome”. Wilkommen is only used for saying e.g. “welcome home”
Thanks!
Here’s a response I’ve seen about this around the net for a while now that feels right.
–
"Actually, the “you’re welcome/no problem” issue is simply a linguistics misunderstanding. Older ppl tend to say “you’re welcome,” younger ppl tend to say “no problem.” This is because for older people the act of helping or assisting someone is seen as a task that is not expected of them, but is them doing extra, so it’s them saying, ‘I accept your thanks because I know I deserve it.”
“No problem, however, is used because younger people feel not only that helping or assisting someone is a given and expected but also that it should be stressed that your need for help was no burden to them (even if it was).”
“Basically, older people think help is a gift you give, younger people think help is a requirement.”
That’s some stereotyping ageist bullshit.
To be fair, with no data to back it up, this is just an anecdote. So saying it’s stereotyping ageist bullshit is a perfectly valid response to it. I just felt it fit the question quite well so I went and dug it up and shared it. If you feel differently, no stress!
The reality is going to be different to everyone, and it’s as much a learned behaviour as anything else. It’s not like collectively an entire generation got together and decided “it’s ‘no problem’ now instead of ‘you’re welcome’, okay?” Language evolves over time after all, and knowing why that happens and the actual causes for it are something that will require a lot more analysis than a couple of anecdotes from the internet.
Yeah, sorry, I should add that I refer to the article, not your posting of it.
The meat of the thing is a rando reply to a tweet by a guy, not any research the guy did.
As a not-so-young-anymore young person, I’ve always said “no problem” for exactly this reason
More of an observation on a generational shift. A culture change with a language change coming with it.
calling it a “linguistics misunderstanding” makes it seem more scientific than it probably is. I’d like to see some evidence to back it up, because to me it just looks like some Tumblr user’s conjecture.
and yet the youngers are the “entitled generation”
you can say “you’re welcome”, its no problem
you can also say “no problem”
hope this helps, you’re welcome
Languages change over time. As long as the intent is clear, don’t get hung up on what is and isn’t “correct”. “You’re welcome” probably was seen as extreme at some point itself.
I mean, I’m fully on board with not getting hung up on what’s “correct”, but these are words that do have a specific meaning and I do find it interesting that the preferred choice of words shifts (even if it is only caused by relatively few people, that actually think about their word choice there).
Specifically, “no problem” is kind of like saying “there’s nothing to thank me for”. And ultimately, it kind of says “I don’t expect something in return”.
Whereas “you’re welcome” acknowledges that yes, I did help you, you are right to thank me for that, and also kind of “I would appreciate you returning the favor”.
My personal theory is that the change in language happens, because we have a lot more contacts with strangers, either in big/foreign cities or online.
When you help a stranger, you know upfront that they won’t be able to return the favor, simply because you won’t stay in contact. So, not only should it definitely not be a personal sacrifice for you to help them, it also feels right to communicate that they don’t owe you anything, so that they can go on in their life.Wow – I think you’re right this makes a lot of sense
I kind of disagree with you, in that when I think about the standalone meanings of the words in each phrase, I think they do say the same thing.
The meaning of the words “You are welcome [to the help I gave you]” implies, to me, that there wasn’t actually anything to offer thanks over. You’re acknowledging their thanks, but telling them that they are welcome to take/use whatever it is you’re talking about. [EDIT: normally when someone tells me I’m welcome to something, I feel less compelled to ask and thank in the future. “You’re welcome to anything in the fridge”, for example.]
It does not imply, to me, that I would appreciate them returning the favour. That might be implied meaning in the phrase, but it’s definitely not what those words mean by themselves.
In any case, “You’re welcome”, “no problem”, “no worries”, etc… are all idioms that mean something different than what their individual words mean. The phrases as a whole carry a different meaning than the words themselves suggest.
Giving permission by saying yes to a “would you mind” question is the hill I die on. Usually I say “I would not mind” but if I’m feeling frisky I’ll say no and watch their brain melt.
I got called out for saying someone was “nuts” for competing in the isle of man TT. Which as a conversational objection, was nuts
What was the beef with “nuts”?
Apparently you can’t call someone “nuts” because something about disability
Ay caramba
Languages change, aye
English, only for the worse
I saw a post a while back that said millennials use “no problem” instead of “you’re welcome” because no problem signifies the act was of little effort and was no problem to do. However, “you’re welcome” implies entitlement, as in you are welcomed to my time and effort, or some shit. I don’t remember, but yeah, just a “generational thing.”
So yeah it’s a “can I speak to your manager” boomer thing, as usual. Only group I ever see getting their panties in a wad over a phrase. Just like “Merry Christmas” changing to “Happy Holidays” erases their religion or dares to put other similar holidays, in the same approximate time of the year on equal footing, making their religious holiday less significant.
The appropriate response is that the debt must be repaid in kind, within the fortnight, lest their house fall into disrepute
Or, simply: noblesse oblige.
Actually, this might be the absolutely most obnoxious possibly response, especially in English. I’ve heard it used unironically in French, and I think I recall hearing it used sardonically in English. Anyone else?
The only time I say those words, Noblesse Oblige, is when I joined a clan of the same name in Kingdom of Loathing. I was still confused then and we just called it NO.
I always go with ‘No worries’ or ‘All good’, because ‘You’re welcome’ feels too formal for everyday conversations, plus as another comment mentioned it’s a generational thing as well
See it’s not that “You’re Welcome” is too formal, I just can’t say it without almost breaking out into this.… Now it just almost sounds sarcastic
And sometimes I just can’t help myself and I ad lib all the lyrics to whatever situation I am in. That movie completely ruined it for me.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
yer welks, guv’nor
“You’re welcome” is too much of a commitment for me. What if I don’t want to help next time but already told the other party they were welcome to my help? Formally revoking that welcome sounds really awkward.
“No problem” is just more honest because it keeps the scope to the current episode. Unless it was a problem but I’m glossing over it to just end the episode, in which case it’s still better than “you’re welcome”.
“Sure”
“You’re welcome” was always taught to me as the proper thing, but sounds slightly stilted. They express the same sentiment, roughly, but “[it was] no problem” is arguably clearer about it. I personally just think it’s a slightly “nicer” nuance.
Of course, sometimes maybe it actually was a problem, and then I’d only say it if going out of my way to be nice about it.
Yes, to me, the nuance is what’s important here.
“You’re welcome” implies you did something good, and you know it. “I am good for doing this for you. You owe me!”
Whereas “no problem” implies it didn’t cause you any trouble. “Doing this for you was not detrimental to my life. You owe me nothing.”
I really don’t think your welcome is meant to mean you owe me.
You owe me
So by saying you are welcome to their action, people are actually saying the opposite? That you are not welcome to it at all? You’re saying it’s ironic?
Reminds me a lot of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Qh_P0_9jsc
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://www.piped.video/watch?v=6Qh_P0_9jsc
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
Disclaimer: These are just my dumb thoughts with zero scientific evidence. Consider the opinion accordingly.
I think it’s tied to how overwhelmed everyone is at all times now. Part of it is often “thanks” is said while someone is beelining out the door, so you don’t often have an opportunity to even say “you’re welcome.” Further, “no problem” is far more indicative of “actually, you didn’t inconvenience me at all by getting my help” in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay. It’s saying to the person saying “thank you” that “it’s okay to have minorly inconvenienced me, it was worth doing anyway.”
Because yes, I am more likely to say “no problem” at this point than “you’re welcome” because most of the time I am dispensing technical information and advice that people usually have to pay to get. That’s the other aspect of it too, we’ve normalized that you have to pay to get anything decent (service or product) and so people offering technical skills and advice outside of a payment plan is definitely viewed differently.
“You’re welcome” is valid but just doesn’t play well in a fast-paced society where everyone expects to have to pay through the nose for decent help and generally doesn’t have the time to give out those kind of favors themselves.
in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay
“You’re welcome” can almost appear condescending or stuck up in those situations whereas “No problem” comes across as an attempt to be a little more genuine
It’s funny you say that because some older people see no problem as rude. Like I know it wasn’t a problem haha
that’s when you hit them with “okay, boomer”
I think to a lot of younger people, “You’re Welcome” is the thing one older person insisted you say when you absolutely do not actually mean it. So younger people have found something else to say when they actually do mean it.
I read somewhere a few years ago that the decline of “you’re welcome” is due to a shifting in definitions or whatever- “you’re welcome” has come to mean “you are always welcome to my free labor” whereas “no problem” says something more like “I don’t have an issue spending my time on you.”
Most languages respond something like “it’s nothing”, de nada. English is a little weird saying “welcome”.
Well, in German we say “bitte” or “gern geschehen”, which is close to the “welcome”. Of course, people can and do also say “kein Problem”. I guess in my experience it depends on how I feel about the task and the person I did it for.
It varies regionally. While “you’re welcome” is not at all unusual in the UK, it’s nowhere near as expected and standard as it is in the US.
I often hear “not at all” as a response, just like “de nada”. It’s also common in the UK not to respond at all, as the thanks are expected.
Swedish says “varsågod” (literally something like “be so good”). Finnish developed social courtesies relatively late, and so translated the Swedish literally to “ole hyvä”. Russian on the other hand uses пожалуйста (pozhaluysta). Don’t know exactly where this last word came from, but nowadays it’s used the same way as “please” as in “please, no thanks needed”
Can I please (pozhaluysta) have this cake?
Yes, here you go.
Thank you!
Please (pozhaluysta)
It’s similar in Polish where you’re welcome (proszę bardzo) literally translates to “please very much”.
Thai/Lao is ไม่เป็นไร/ບໍ່ເປັນຫຍັງ translated as (implied subject “it”) + negation marker + copula + anything or “it’s nothing”
Hey do you guys know what “you’re welcome” is in Spanish? “De Nada” which means “of nothing”. Sounds almost like, “no problem”.
This phrase isn’t new, either. It’s been around for centuries, just like the first instances of “you’re welcome”.
i usually hit 'em with the classic “of course” or “anytime” because you’re welcome feels too formal for most situations
