I can accept a lot of consequences for my socialist actions succeeding. I accepted I could die. I could lose all my money, my home, my car. I could be socially assassinated and made into a monster hated by anyone and everyone. I could BECOME an actual monster. I could be tortured to death. I could fail 1000 times, my efforts could amount to nothing, and then be tortured to death.
I cannot accept losing my mother. But she already told me it’s okay if it comes to that. And it’s killing me. I have nobody else.
How much blood will it take? How much insanity, how much pain, how much wicked deeds…do we have the privilege to ever draw the line? anywhere? I laugh and scream and cry my eyes out but there is no catharsis. I am sorry to the millions of those who came before us who endured worse and their names are not remembered. Ending this system of cruelty, this cycle of fear and suffering, it must happen at any cost. This can’t keep happening.
Til death do us part, comrades!
o7
I often ask myself how much I’m willing to sacrifice, too. It’s good to hear others have similar thoughts as it’s easy to feel alone when e.g. strikebreakers volunteer to do your work during industrial action and then have the gall to smile and tell you about it as if they’ve done you a favour (oblivious). I also find it helpful to remember all those who came before and all those who will come after me.
(PS I hope you’re not planning any adventurism and please don’t incriminate yourself even if you are, just think twice!)
Hey, thank you for the concern, I definitely have had a very emotional day but in behavior I am stable. I have some, as the kids call it “kooky schemes” I work toward but I would never self snitch too hard 😁
Cheers o7
