TL;DR Drink driving rescuing people from floodwaters
It’s late at night, my area was flooding, and I was on my deck with the neighbour sinking beers, waiting to have to evacuate and head uphil to his place.
Then we see a stock 4×4 down the road hit the floodwaters all wrong, lights shut, car’s dead in the water. I realised I am quite intoxicated but am the only way these people can get out safely. So I grab my keys, get in low range, and carefully drive down there. We realise they can’t wind windows down anymore and there’s too much weight of water to open the doors, all the while water was rising about 30cm an hour.
So we drove in—something my rig is made for and has done many river and water crossings. We park up, but this guys got no idea where his hook was to attach recovery gear, so it was time to go swimming and search under their car. Found it, got a shackle and strap in, climbed back in through my window and off we go. Somehow my drunk ass is remembering they’ll have no power steering, and I need to take big turns to not get them driven into other objects. Manage to pull them up the hill, chock the wheels because the e-brake was failing, and done. They were very grateful, amazed I had all this recovery gear on me, but I was kind of staggering and definitely slurring, feeling like a wreckless POS for driving so drunk. But in the end, our experience meant we performed a clinical rescue. I was personally fucking impressed.
Then down the hill another cars drives in and stuck. Little hatchback this time and it’s floating… Here we go again.
Threat to life and no alternative trumps a DUI question with no witnesses. And if there were any credible witnesses they’d’ve been dicks.
Chad
Stories like these were why I loved the Alien-Site back then and what I’m missing there now. In Lemmy I found the right place 🤗
Not all heroes are sober.
So my dad dies a number of months ago (please no condolences, he was a POS), and my chronically jobless older brother asked our sister and I if he could have the full social security payout. When I say chronically jobless, he has some seriously in-demand skills and experience, but he doesn’t have the formal education because he never felt like going to college (which would have been paid FOR him) and he absorbed our dad’s personality from living with him this whole time, which I’m sure is the primary reason why all his interviews fall through. Now, Im minorly pissed off because we let him have basically everything dad had owned, but I say yeah sure whatever, I’m not about to start any drama over this. well turns out he either filed wrong, or SS made a mistake, because I get a check in the mail for half. He has no idea, our mom has no idea, so I cash that shit.
Pirating and Ad-blocking.
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I copied that floppy
Steal from an employer
In my defense, I’d like to live in a country where retirement is an option. I don’t get paid enough to save. Something needs to flex 🤷🏻♀️
Like boys
I’ve shut down so many fascist/groomer discord servers by merely existing so much that nazis will literally panic at the sight of my username.
Someone once compared me to “Jay Jay the Jet Plane flying away from an explosion” for the level of chaos I cause and … yeah, accurate.
Get divorced. Quit studying and work. Quit work and study. Not pay all my debts before investing. Probably very mundane stuff, but there’s a lot of “not supposed to” that doesn’t make sense in every situation.
I’ll see if I can think of something trickier.
I steal from large corporations whenever I can. Claim items didn’t arrive when they did, claim they sent the wrong item etc.
