Today we'll be going into the eternal mystery, why do guys play as girl characters? Males tend to play female avatars for a Varity of reasons, so let's go ov...
What if we find gender fluidity interesting, but lack body dysmorphia(well, regarding sex anyway. I don’t like my body, but that’s because I could stand to loose some weight). I also grew up a bit on Ranma 1/2. I don’t have a particular body I want to be in, but I think swapping on desire would be cool. There’s no trauma or hardship in my feelings, just general interest.
This is the kind of thing I’ve seen people in their first years exploring gender say, only to then later on come back and be like “yeah lol lmao” at their earlier thoughts when things change for them later on.
This will probably come across as condescending but it’s not and I sincerely wish you all the best. It’s just difficult to guess this information through the internet you know.
yeah i kinda loathe the idea of the ‘prime directive of transness’ that some people espouse. nah im for trans colonialism of every cishet mind. jokes aside, i think a lot of people are afraid of pressuring someone, when really all youre doing is stating similar experiences to avoid thought termination. i kinda wish i had someone grab me by the collar and trans my gender forcefully inform me of trans shit in a detailed way when i was younger, would have saved so much heartache and wasted time.
I think the problem is that it always comes across as if you’re speaking down to someone like they’re a child. It’s a very much a “you’re at an early stage” thing and inevitably because you’re talking about a passage of time experience it ALWAYS comes across as “you just need time to mature”. The roles are always sort of someone more-developed vs someone less-developed, and for the person being placed in the less-developed role essentially against their will (they didn’t choose to have a teacher/student conversation) of the interaction this feels like condescension.
So I have to hedge like crazy while doing this to try and get it across that I am saying this because I genuinely truly care and want to help. It’s quite plausible that it might not be that, but it’s also going to be better for them to explore faster, sooner, rather than slower and feeling dumb about earlier-self later like literally everyone has had that shared experience.
There has to be a better way to go about this for more positive outcomes.
yeah thats true, i find it more helpful to just describe my experience in detail, theres been a lot of people that came to me and talked about stuff but just ended up being cis guys that like cock and crossdressing. they felt like they didnt fit in the masculinity box and felt weird because of it, but really they just wanted to redefine what masculinity was in their head, and the real masculinity is not giving a fuck about what other men think and being a sigma chad into the maid girl outfit grindset
ok i really need to stop making really shit jokes in this thread. if you wanna amplify your experience of my posts, please imagine noam chomsky saying what im saying
Sometimes, knowing earlier just ramps up angst earlier. One situation that comes to mind is the teenager with no means to safely pursue a transition. Once an egg cracks, if you can’t act on it, it’s agonizing
One minute, you’re giggling at one of those sissy hypno videos because the “subliminal” messages are just so over-the-top silly. The next, you’re buying a copy of The C Programming Language by Kernighan and Ritchie off of Amazon and there’s a pair of striped thigh-highs in your cart because hey, bundle deal. Then you wake up one morning and start cruising the Turkish dark Web for DIY hormones.
It’s not a vicious cycle, per se, but there’s definitely a point in there somewhere that you have to stop and say, “yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m not cis.”
I will definitely let you know that (I’m assuming you’re AMAB) that’s not a thought that most cis men have. That also resonates super deeply with me, not only do I like expressing some masculine and some feminine qualities, but I also have a lot of qualities that I wish I could control on demand too. Genderfluidity and non-binaryness are definitely identities that can be “hatched” imo. I consider myself someone who used to be an egg and hatched, I’m on a typical transwoman’s hormone regimen, but I’m definitely more nonbinary/genderfluid than I am trans woman.
this is a fairly common subset of medical transitioners too, theres a lot of people that really dont wanna fuck with gender (or really wanna fuck with it) but love tonguing some estradiol
shits complicated and can really give you a lot of clarity and purpose once you figure it out
Sorry new law by Joe biden you admitting this means you must now be trans. Please report to your local queerification clinic to have your genders applied.
I play girl characters in games far more than I used to, but I mean, I don’t think I’m uncomfortable with my assigned gender(?)
However, I wouldn’t be truthful here if I didn’t admit that I’ve started to question how comfortable I really am with living life as a man. I can’t tell if there’s something about that I don’t like, or if I’m just dissatisfied with life in general right now. Or both.
One thing I do know for sure is that girl characters are just more fun to look at. Seriously, my favorite Tav on BG3 is just the most beautiful Amazonian tiefling, I love her so much
If by “neat” you mean very painful because generally once that egg cracks various feelings get worse and worse and worse and worse until something is done about it… I sincerely hope they have a good network around them if that’s the road coming.
seconding what you’re hearing that questioning is good. It’s easy to see an AMAB man-identifying person expressing discontent with masculinity and immediately start the “TRANSGIRL ” posting, and a lot of folks do. I will say that what you’re thinking are very common thoughts that shortly pre-transition folks have a lot, but that said, your gender journey, should you decide to have one, is yours, and while you should lean into what you hear from your peers, you do you. If you think there’s a chance you might be transfem or otherwise gender non-conforming, I’d recommend digging around here https://genderdysphoria.fyi/ (long) and this https://medium.com/@cassielabelle/gender-dysphoria-isnt-what-you-think-6fdc7ae3ac85 (short), and seeing if anything resonates with you, but bear in mind that there is absolutely nothing universal here and lots of the experiences are things that cis people can feel too.
At the end of the day, this reply gets it right - you can try things out and you’ll be all the stronger for it. I never played as girl characters, but here I am, several months into E and at transfem levels, but at the same time I’m going to the gym and curling/benching and keeping stubble on my face - there’s no right answer and there’s no right process besides taking everything a la carte and embracing things that bring you joy while setting free things that don’t.
Questioning is good! I love when folks take the opportunity to explore their gender. Even if at the end of it you find you are in fact cis, you are deepening your knowledge of yourself and your gender identity.
Honestly, I think the world would be a better place if everyone took the time to do that.
All the best to you in the new year!
Thank you so much, you as well! And yeah, this has been a weird, difficult year for me, and it’s come with a fair bit of introspection for sure. I finally admitted to myself that I’m bisexual, though I’m already committed and haven’t been able to really explore that yet.
At any rate, my most honest answer that I can give right now is that I’m probably cis, but not terribly interested in performing manhood traditionally. How far and in what fashion I want to break away from that is something I haven’t yet figured out. But I might also on some level be conflating those feelings with the deep envy and yearning I feel when I see the solidarity between women, particularly trans women, and other queer people generally. It’s made me realize just how lonely I’ve been for so many years. Part of that is on me, I’m terrible about putting myself out there, but I suspect it’s also to do with manhood generally. Whatever the case, I really am tired of it.
… deep envy and yearning I feel when I see the solidarity between women, particularly trans women, and other queer people generally…
This is another common trans thought. Doesnt necessarily mean anytjing though either. Gender envy isn’t entirely within the realm if trans, it just manifests differently.
Best way to know is to try acting on gendery thoughts you would normally suppress, if touve been suppressing stuff. Experimentation is key to ajy self discovery.
If you’re sure you’re cis, the point of experimentation might be lost on you, or at least not particularly appealing on some level.
It’s pretty hard for me to imagine what I would look like lol, tall and burly and hairy as I am now, but certainly nothing about that possibility bothers me. I’ve always preferred the company of women. Totally not incriminating myself further here, I know
If youre comfortable with being a man, but not with the totality of masculinity, demiman and GNC are options. Ive been thinking I might be a demiman as my bio states.
I’ll have to give that some thought myself, but of course, in the best of all possible worlds, we would redefine what masculinity even is, as it’s clear that many aspects of traditional masculinity are harmful, to us and to everyone around us
I can’t be the only one who got the default name cause the menu is confusing and if you press x thinking it will open a keypad for typing a name it instead confirms Tav and finishes the customization
in my case I turned out to be agender, and although I am not a woman or femme IRL I gravitate more towards female characters in part because I don’t like identifying with men. also girls are pretty
A bunch of them are eggs, but I genuinely think a lot of the people who do are just cum-brained (Blizzard characters doing a good job of demonstrating that point for me). There’s a thing in de-facto harem anime like SAO that there basically can’t be other important male characters within the MC’s peer group because there can’t be even the vaguest notion of his female peers possibly being attracted to someone that isn’t him. There can be no competition! I think in a cishet cum-brain’s conception of things, playing as a female character can have a similar appeal because you control her agency and constantly have her in view of your camera, typically completely oblivious to your perspective as you look at her from whichever which way.
But I broadly avoid media and people like this, so I wouldn’t know
Genuinely I think if I bothered playing as a female character in a game I think my egg would’ve cracked 5-10 years early. Spent nearly a decade insisting on playing as a man in RPGs while fighting character creators and getting pissed off at male character bodytypes, animations, voice acting, clothing options, so on.
there’s simply no shot that a sizeable percentage of men who play girl characters aren’t eggs
very surprised to see the video not even mention this possibility
What if we find gender fluidity interesting, but lack body dysmorphia(well, regarding sex anyway. I don’t like my body, but that’s because I could stand to loose some weight). I also grew up a bit on Ranma 1/2. I don’t have a particular body I want to be in, but I think swapping on desire would be cool. There’s no trauma or hardship in my feelings, just general interest.
How long have you been exploring this?
This is the kind of thing I’ve seen people in their first years exploring gender say, only to then later on come back and be like “yeah lol lmao” at their earlier thoughts when things change for them later on.
This will probably come across as condescending but it’s not and I sincerely wish you all the best. It’s just difficult to guess this information through the internet you know.
yeah i kinda loathe the idea of the ‘prime directive of transness’ that some people espouse. nah im for trans colonialism of every cishet mind. jokes aside, i think a lot of people are afraid of pressuring someone, when really all youre doing is stating similar experiences to avoid thought termination. i kinda wish i had someone grab me by the collar and
trans my gender forcefullyinform me of trans shit in a detailed way when i was younger, would have saved so much heartache and wasted time.I think the problem is that it always comes across as if you’re speaking down to someone like they’re a child. It’s a very much a “you’re at an early stage” thing and inevitably because you’re talking about a passage of time experience it ALWAYS comes across as “you just need time to mature”. The roles are always sort of someone more-developed vs someone less-developed, and for the person being placed in the less-developed role essentially against their will (they didn’t choose to have a teacher/student conversation) of the interaction this feels like condescension.
So I have to hedge like crazy while doing this to try and get it across that I am saying this because I genuinely truly care and want to help. It’s quite plausible that it might not be that, but it’s also going to be better for them to explore faster, sooner, rather than slower and feeling dumb about earlier-self later like literally everyone has had that shared experience.
There has to be a better way to go about this for more positive outcomes.
yeah thats true, i find it more helpful to just describe my experience in detail, theres been a lot of people that came to me and talked about stuff but just ended up being cis guys that like cock and crossdressing. they felt like they didnt fit in the masculinity box and felt weird because of it, but really they just wanted to redefine what masculinity was in their head, and the real masculinity is not giving a fuck about what other men think and being a sigma chad into the maid girl outfit grindset
ok i really need to stop making really shit jokes in this thread. if you wanna amplify your experience of my posts, please imagine noam chomsky saying what im saying
Sometimes, knowing earlier just ramps up angst earlier. One situation that comes to mind is the teenager with no means to safely pursue a transition. Once an egg cracks, if you can’t act on it, it’s agonizing
One minute, you’re giggling at one of those sissy hypno videos because the “subliminal” messages are just so over-the-top silly. The next, you’re buying a copy of The C Programming Language by Kernighan and Ritchie off of Amazon and there’s a pair of striped thigh-highs in your cart because hey, bundle deal. Then you wake up one morning and start cruising the Turkish dark Web for DIY hormones.
It’s not a vicious cycle, per se, but there’s definitely a point in there somewhere that you have to stop and say, “yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m not cis.”
I will definitely let you know that (I’m assuming you’re AMAB) that’s not a thought that most cis men have. That also resonates super deeply with me, not only do I like expressing some masculine and some feminine qualities, but I also have a lot of qualities that I wish I could control on demand too. Genderfluidity and non-binaryness are definitely identities that can be “hatched” imo. I consider myself someone who used to be an egg and hatched, I’m on a typical transwoman’s hormone regimen, but I’m definitely more nonbinary/genderfluid than I am trans woman.
this is a fairly common subset of medical transitioners too, theres a lot of people that really dont wanna fuck with gender (or really wanna fuck with it) but love tonguing some estradiol
shits complicated and can really give you a lot of clarity and purpose once you figure it out
Dysphoria/Dysmorphia isn’t a requirement to be trans or nonbinary. There are folks who only get euphoria from it
hm, yes this is also why i thought i didnt like my body
Sorry new law by Joe biden you admitting this means you must now be trans. Please report to your local queerification clinic to have your genders applied.
I play girl characters in games far more than I used to, but I mean, I don’t think I’m uncomfortable with my assigned gender(?)
However, I wouldn’t be truthful here if I didn’t admit that I’ve started to question how comfortable I really am with living life as a man. I can’t tell if there’s something about that I don’t like, or if I’m just dissatisfied with life in general right now. Or both.
One thing I do know for sure is that girl characters are just more fun to look at. Seriously, my favorite Tav on BG3 is just the most beautiful Amazonian tiefling, I love her so much
so it begins
you have a very neat road ahead of you
If by “neat” you mean very painful because generally once that egg cracks various feelings get worse and worse and worse and worse until something is done about it… I sincerely hope they have a good network around them if that’s the road coming.
yeah
yeah
egg prime directive, comrade
Okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
fuck the prime directive
YEAHHHHHHHHhhhh
Penny for your thoughts?
seconding what you’re hearing that questioning is good. It’s easy to see an AMAB man-identifying person expressing discontent with masculinity and immediately start the “TRANSGIRL
” posting, and a lot of folks do. I will say that what you’re thinking are very common thoughts that shortly pre-transition folks have a lot, but that said, your gender journey, should you decide to have one, is yours, and while you should lean into what you hear from your peers, you do you. If you think there’s a chance you might be transfem or otherwise gender non-conforming, I’d recommend digging around here https://genderdysphoria.fyi/ (long) and this https://medium.com/@cassielabelle/gender-dysphoria-isnt-what-you-think-6fdc7ae3ac85 (short), and seeing if anything resonates with you, but bear in mind that there is absolutely nothing universal here and lots of the experiences are things that cis people can feel too.
At the end of the day, this reply gets it right - you can try things out and you’ll be all the stronger for it. I never played as girl characters, but here I am, several months into E and at transfem levels, but at the same time I’m going to the gym and curling/benching and keeping stubble on my face - there’s no right answer and there’s no right process besides taking everything a la carte and embracing things that bring you joy while setting free things that don’t.
Questioning is good! I love when folks take the opportunity to explore their gender. Even if at the end of it you find you are in fact cis, you are deepening your knowledge of yourself and your gender identity. Honestly, I think the world would be a better place if everyone took the time to do that. All the best to you in the new year!
Thank you so much, you as well! And yeah, this has been a weird, difficult year for me, and it’s come with a fair bit of introspection for sure. I finally admitted to myself that I’m bisexual, though I’m already committed and haven’t been able to really explore that yet.
At any rate, my most honest answer that I can give right now is that I’m probably cis, but not terribly interested in performing manhood traditionally. How far and in what fashion I want to break away from that is something I haven’t yet figured out. But I might also on some level be conflating those feelings with the deep envy and yearning I feel when I see the solidarity between women, particularly trans women, and other queer people generally. It’s made me realize just how lonely I’ve been for so many years. Part of that is on me, I’m terrible about putting myself out there, but I suspect it’s also to do with manhood generally. Whatever the case, I really am tired of it.
This is another common trans thought. Doesnt necessarily mean anytjing though either. Gender envy isn’t entirely within the realm if trans, it just manifests differently.
Best way to know is to try acting on gendery thoughts you would normally suppress, if touve been suppressing stuff. Experimentation is key to ajy self discovery.
If you’re sure you’re cis, the point of experimentation might be lost on you, or at least not particularly appealing on some level.
talk to trans women more (you’re not weird for doing so btw, asking questions to find your identity isn’t a bad thing)
If you woke up tomorrow as a woman version of you, would you be okay with that?
It’s pretty hard for me to imagine what I would look like lol, tall and burly and hairy as I am now, but certainly nothing about that possibility bothers me. I’ve always preferred the company of women. Totally not incriminating myself further here, I know
What counts is how comfortable you are with yourself
and idk ya can change a lot with HRT if you’re interested:
(all AMAB to female hormone treatment)
If youre comfortable with being a man, but not with the totality of masculinity, demiman and GNC are options. Ive been thinking I might be a demiman as my bio states.
I’ll have to give that some thought myself, but of course, in the best of all possible worlds, we would redefine what masculinity even is, as it’s clear that many aspects of traditional masculinity are harmful, to us and to everyone around us
Yeah i go back and forth between “im a demiman” and “i strive to be a positive represination of nontoxic masculinity”
Tav?
Tav is the default name for custom Baldur’s Gate 3 protags.
I can’t be the only one who got the default name cause the menu is confusing and if you press x thinking it will open a keypad for typing a name it instead confirms Tav and finishes the customization
in my case I turned out to be agender, and although I am not a woman or femme IRL I gravitate more towards female characters in part because I don’t like identifying with men. also girls are pretty
A bunch of them are eggs, but I genuinely think a lot of the people who do are just cum-brained (Blizzard characters doing a good job of demonstrating that point for me). There’s a thing in de-facto harem anime like SAO that there basically can’t be other important male characters within the MC’s peer group because there can’t be even the vaguest notion of his female peers possibly being attracted to someone that isn’t him. There can be no competition! I think in a cishet cum-brain’s conception of things, playing as a female character can have a similar appeal because you control her agency and constantly have her in view of your camera, typically completely oblivious to your perspective as you look at her from whichever which way.
But I broadly avoid media and people like this, so I wouldn’t know
Genuinely I think if I bothered playing as a female character in a game I think my egg would’ve cracked 5-10 years early. Spent nearly a decade insisting on playing as a man in RPGs while fighting character creators and getting pissed off at male character bodytypes, animations, voice acting, clothing options, so on.
Repression’s a hell of a drug lmao