I’ve had a crush on a girl for months now. I don’t know why. I just saw her out of no where and thought, “she’s really pretty.” Now I notice her more than anyone else!! Help!!
I don’t want any crushes because I have important things to focus on, but I can’t help but think about her. I find myself fantasizing about hanging out with her and had many dreams about her. And the fact that we made eye contact quite a lot and her appearing out of no where in school did not help at all!!! 😭😭😭
I’ve tried not thinking about her, avoid seeing her, pretending I hate her, pretending she hates me, and even MANIFESTING my feelings to go away. (Which worked for three days 😥) I even tried looking at her more to desensitize myself!! Wanna know what made my feelings come back? The freaking eye contact!! As a loner, any attractive person giving me eye contact makes my heart jump. Especially her!!! And it’s really hard because love songs make me think about her 😭😭
Yeah yeah I know I should talk to her… but it’s hard to bring myself to :(( There’s so many issues. I’m introverted, and I would break down trying to talk to her. Her friends are not someone I would hang around, they kind of give toxic vibes, and I noticed myself being attracted to toxic type of girls, and it happened many times before. Maybe it’s because I come from a toxic household? I don’t know :(
Anyways
TL;DR I have a hopeless crush on someone, don’t want the feelings because I have more important things to tend to, but these feelings are getting in the way of my thinking and I just think I don’t need those feelings!! Help please 😥
I know I can’t run from feelings, I wish I could 😔 One day I think I’m close to the exit, and then boom, the exit pulls further away from me :(
Stop trying to get rid of your feelings. You can’t. As someone who as always hated having a crush and who has tried every single method possible, trust me on this. Crushes aren’t rational so don’t try to rationalize it away.
First, acknowledge that a crush is just a fantasy. That doesn’t mean minimizing your own emotions, your feelings are still very real, but it’s important to be conscious of the fact that you don’t actually know this girl or anything about her. She just makes you feel some type of way. The best way to get over a crush is to get to know them as people. It breaks the illusion, and/or allows for a real connection to be made. If that’s absolutely not an option however, the only thing you can really do is give it time and stay distracted. Express and feel your feelings when they show up, but try not to wallow and obsess. Easier said than done, yes, but it can be done. Just takes a really long time for some people. It’s taken me years at times. Don’t let that discourage you though, it doesn’t hurt the same all the time. It does get better.
Thank you! This reply actually gave me a reality check. I would find myself drowning in these feelings but then again they’re just fantasies that I should just take and move on. Thank you comrade :))
Glad I could help! I knew my past as a trainwreck in love would eventually pay off somehow lol