It’s September the eleventh of 2001. A second tower has hit the planes. The newly elected president Bush and his cabinet lay the foundation for the coming decades.
March of 2003 the United States invades the nation of Iraq based on lies and manipulated intelligence.
While stationed in Iraq, Beau Biden, son of a senator, inhales toxic fumes from burn pits.
It’s 2008 and Barack Obama chooses a senior senator to be his vice president nominee, Joe Biden.
It’s 2012, Joe Biden nimbly dodges around Paul Ryan at the debate. People say he might run in 2016, but the general consensus is that Clinton will run this time.
2015, Beau Biden dies from pit cancer.
2016, Clinton eats shit and doesn’t die but is politically dead. Her turn failed. Cheeto man is triumphant.
2019-2020, COVID is killing everyone it can, Biden runs and wins because of the pandemic.
2024, late in the game Biden finally brain oopsies too publicly, must be discarded like the wax paper on the bottom of a cupcake. Kamala flails about billion-dollarly and eats shit, Cheeto man returns.
I should have added a bit about how Beau’s death both ensures the Clinton nom in 2016 and Biden’s weird dogged persistence to “do it for Beau” to re-enter politics after 2016 - the year he probably could have won - had already come and gone. Without COVID his Beaulusions of grandeur would have slammed into a rock called MAGA.
Because jokes aside, I kinda believe this is all true to varying degrees.
It’s September the eleventh of 2001. A second tower has hit the planes. The newly elected president Bush and his cabinet lay the foundation for the coming decades.
March of 2003 the United States invades the nation of Iraq based on lies and manipulated intelligence.
While stationed in Iraq, Beau Biden, son of a senator, inhales toxic fumes from burn pits.
It’s 2008 and Barack Obama chooses a senior senator to be his vice president nominee, Joe Biden.
It’s 2012, Joe Biden nimbly dodges around Paul Ryan at the debate. People say he might run in 2016, but the general consensus is that Clinton will run this time.
2015, Beau Biden dies from pit cancer.
2016, Clinton eats shit and doesn’t die but is politically dead. Her turn failed. Cheeto man is triumphant.
2019-2020, COVID is killing everyone it can, Biden runs and wins because of the pandemic.
2024, late in the game Biden finally brain oopsies too publicly, must be discarded like the wax paper on the bottom of a cupcake. Kamala flails about billion-dollarly and eats shit, Cheeto man returns.
Bush doing 9/11 caused Kamala to fail
I read it in his voice
Yes the towers doing the terrorism is cannon now.
I should have added a bit about how Beau’s death both ensures the Clinton nom in 2016 and Biden’s weird dogged persistence to “do it for Beau” to re-enter politics after 2016 - the year he probably could have won - had already come and gone. Without COVID his Beaulusions of grandeur would have slammed into a rock called MAGA.
Because jokes aside, I kinda believe this is all true to varying degrees.