I’m in that state rn and I’m doing deep breaths as well as reminding myself where shit like my door, window and tv are but it isn’t helping like it usually does.

  • sappho [she/her]@hexbear.netEnglish
    1·
    4 years ago

    Oh my goodness I relate to that so much. One of the hardest parts of the recovery process has been trying to stop blaming myself for my trauma reactions. I’ve been in a funk all week and I’m mad at myself for not even thinking to use my coping skills and just dissociating, and then I’m frustrated at myself for the coping skills not working (am I doing it wrong?), and on and on.

    It’s a bit weird but sometimes it helps me to look at fluff videos of abused dogs being rehabilitated. Something about seeing an animal suffering just like me reminds me that the main things I need in this process are love, gentleness, and compassion. I’d never get frustrated at a dog for being frightened and unable to calm down.

    I really would recommend Pete Walker’s work if you find his flashback stuff useful! His book Surviving to Thriving was one of the first I read on CPTSD and it felt like finally finding the instruction manual for my brain. It can be a really heavy read though and bring up a lot of buried feelings.