If you come in here to be unnecessarily hostile to the OP and claim he deserves to suffer because he’s struggling, I will ban your ass. I’m very disappointed.
what if you deserve to suffer /j
No one here but me decides who deserves to suffer.
What if life is suffering?
insert pic of sicko Schopenhauer going ´hahaha, yes’ here
If I wanted to describe what Marx’s “alienation” was to someone I would show them this post.
This fits a general definition of alienation, but Marx was focused on alienation generated from capitalist production
We’re well past production alienation and into complete and total societal and communal alienation as a result of “there is no society” ideology and total atomisation.
What does total societal alienation mean? People still have families, friends, communities, and relationships that are not mediated by the market
Much about even those relationships is mediated by the market, though. If you want to spend time with people as adults, you have to pay rent in a bar or coffee shop or festival, etc. Even if you can do it for ‘free’ at someone’s house, it tends to imply getting some food and drinks in, soft or alcoholic, even if you prepare things together rather than ordering. And it only takes one person in the group to be obsessed by some asinine bourgeois shit for every engagement to revolve around spending money and keeping up appearances. I even know married couples who tit-for-tat about paying for things. If you’ve not seen or experienced this, I’m jealous.
Even if you can do it for ‘free’ at someone’s house, it tends to imply getting some food and drinks in, soft or alcoholic, even if you prepare things together rather than ordering
It’s also only socially acceptable to invite somebody to “hang out at your house” if you’re both already close friends. Otherwise, you have to go to a bar, go to some event, get food together, etc.
That’s right. And it relies on having space. Not really possible in shared accommodation even if you’re close. That depends a little on the friend and who you’re loving with, I suppose.
It’s also only socially acceptable to invite somebody to “hang out at your house” if you’re both already close friends. Otherwise, you have to go to a bar, go to some event, get food together, etc.
in america it’s only safe to […]
Because every aspect of our society has had capital infiltrate it.
There is almost no interaction you will have with other people that will not involve paying a rent to someone, whether it is for the space you seek to have that interaction in or whether you are required to pay a consumption fee for social interaction (food/drinks/movies/whatever). These rents have driven people apart, driven people to complete alienation from interaction with one another. It has created inceldom among the young and guttural loneliness among the old.
Most people in much of the west now do not know their neighbours and there are no communities. If 80 year old Mary two doors down drops dead she won’t be found for 2 or 3 weeks.
Every home has become the equivalent of an office cubicle, and people stay in their cubicles because there is literally no interaction they can have after exiting that does not involve some sort of rent. They stay in their cubicles and become atomised because there is expectation of rent literally everywhere outside of it.
Capitalism as a system wants all of us to feel this way. It wants us alienated from one another, atomized, and convinced that any attempt to find community and solidarity is impossible. Don’t listen to it. The fact that so many people in this thread are commenting some variation of “damn, I really feel this” exposes this feeling for the corrosive lie it is. Maybe you haven’t found your community yet, but don’t let capitalism grind you down and make you start thinking you have no community. Keep at it, comrade. You will get there, and you are worth it.
I think you are thinking of yourself as being static and unchanging relative to this new turn. You have changed and you will keep changing. If communism is what you believe in, then there’s nothing stopping you from making yourself into more of a communist.
Thanks for the reminder, you’re definitely right
A lot of these changes have come within the last 1-3 years and I’m pretty used to making new circles of friends, advancing to new stages of my life, etc. within a year but my current changes might just take me longer
no more half measures walter
What is “stereotypical autistic culture” lol?
Also I don’t get any of the replies to you in this thread. People seem unnecessarily hostile but maybe they’re just being facetious? I have no idea.
Hobbies where autistic people are extremely overrepresented and hobbies common for autistic people
TTRPG, video games, furry, etc.
I can guarantee there’s asd people on every kind of subject though. Just find those people in the hobby you’re interested in and you’ll have a good sync.
There’s millions of people just like you.
I dunno if there were millions of well off western communists I think communism as an ideology would be in a better place. Rich people discovering communism is pretty fucking rare in my experience and historically speaking.
There’s a ton of us petite bourgeois communists, but we don’t always do the best things for the movement.
Are there even millions of Western communists at all haha?
American communist party membership is like what, 10-30k right now? And like half of that are Trots?
People who don’t organize, while still cool, unfortunately don’t count since we’re talking about the progress of communism
At the very least, there’s dozens of us. Dozens!
I mean what do you consider rich?
A million odd, discarded puzzle pieces that don’t fit with anyone ´normal’ or even each other.
What is a “liberal” personality?
I think I mostly mean hobbies and interests that are commonly seen in communists vs seen in liberals
Examples being: I’m somewhat intrigued by designer fashion, enjoy occasionally indulging in lavish consumerism (fine dining, expensive experiences, etc.), enjoy some superficial shit like certain holidays (Valentine’s, Christmas, etc.), enjoy making myself look as attractive as possible to the point of vanity, etc.
However, I’m not particularly interested in a sustainable/environmentally friendly lifestyle (I’m not wasteful and I do try to reduce my footprint, just never at significant expense of my comfort or effort), not vegan, not interested/participating in any social justice beyond just “generic” communist/workplace labor/anti-war organizing, talking about any sort of politics IRL (lol), etc.
It’s a little hard to grasp myself but I think a somewhat good way to describe it is that because of my upbringing and past efforts to fit in with the people I’ve grown up with, I’m pretty much just your typical “upper middle” class corporate liberal (and that culture is extremely cishet, patriarchal, allistic, neurotypical, and white) in all ways except I understand class theory, I’m radicalized af, I’m not bigoted, and I organize in a communist party
I can see how having upper middle class interests would isolate you from other communist, its probably not possible for them to share your interests because they are beyond their financial means, but maybe you could try to find a new interest that you could have in common with the communists you come in contact with
Yea, I’ve been trying but it’s a little bit difficult because of the chicken egg situation
I only have well off friends -> end up doing stuff that mostly well off people enjoy
And to befriend non well off people I need to be interested in stuff that non well off people do and enjoy, but that’s also infinitely easier when I can hang out and fit in with non well off people
And to befriend non well off people I need to be interested in stuff that non well off people do and enjoy, but that’s also infinitely easier when I can hang out and fit in with non well off people
Can’t you hang out with fellow party members? When I was in a party we hung out fairly regularly after meetings and such.
I do a lot but hanging out is a lot different than being close friends
Maybe invite some of them to hang out in private? Maybe treat them to some of the bougie shit you enjoy? I didn’t meet many communists that were inherently against eating or drinking nice stuff, most just can’t really afford it.
I’m not close enough to anybody to invite them to a thing outside of party events yet :(
I’m still working on it though!
Actually now that I think about it, I have a few times but those friendships all fizzled out due to them not committing to organizing regularly so we drifted
I do enjoy the finer things in life as well. However, I still advocate for the balkanization and demilitarization of the USA. When you say you don’t ‘fit in’ with other people, do you mean in terms of making friends or acquaintances?
Not judging but maybe its a “you” problem ? Like I have a friend that I would consider an average progressive / socdem. I think all billionaires should be shot … he doesnt think so. That doesnt stop us from being friends though.
but maybe its a “you” problem ?
Well yea, I think my post pretty clearly implied that
And yes, I mean making friends and acquaintances
I had absolutely no issues with that back then when I was masking my autism, tried to fit in with well off liberals, and thought I was cishet
But now I’m trying to become friends with people completely outside of that demographic and it’s hard for the aforementioned reasons in the post and other comments
Hmm I dont think I have any real advice. Im usually pretty good at getting along with people outside of my comfort zone. Even getting friendly with them. Like im queer but all of my friends except 1 guy are just cis het.Then again I can see it being difficult getting close to people that run in different circles.
Either way - Good Luck
I did like your Donghua Jinlong’s Industrial Grade Glycine post btw.
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You can enjoy life and be a communist, it’s okay!
I know, which is why I still do it and don’t consider myself any less of a communist than other organizers
I just recognize that outside of politics personality and interests wise, I have way more in common with the average neo/liberal than communist
I mean, you sound pretty young, in which case the people you’re talking about are still young too. A lot of people that you assume are white supremacists have never been challenged on their beliefs or lack thereof. Maybe don’t write off so many people as impossible to befriend, they could become just as left as you, but you’ll never know if you don’t give anybody a chance.
I mean yea, I don’t think they’re unconvertible but as a minority, I don’t have any energy left to try and convince almost everybody I meet that Asians aren’t brainwashed hordes or want to take over our country or that Africans aren’t inherently dumber or more inclined towards violence and uncivility
Even as a child I never had xenophobia near approaching what I hear today and I’m not going to sit there and explain to them why my ancestors and the rest of the world aren’t inferior
I think way less people actively hold those beliefs than you think. Yes, those stereotypes are ingrained in the western mind, but if you ask most people if those things were true they would say no.
You can’t hold everyone you meet to the standard of “if you’re not a devout communist, you are a blatant racist, homophobe, etc”. And yeah it is not your job or responsibility to educate people, but if you see enemies everywhere, it’s going to be hard to make friends and you are going to make yourself miserable. I’m not trying to be condescending or tell you how to live your life, I just think you are being the enemy of your own happiness.
I think the last 4/5 times I casually brought up Tiktok to acquaintances/strangers they say something about the Chinese communists controlling our youths or spreading propaganda
Half the times somebody asks me what phone I have and I tell them it’s a Xiaomi or OnePlus they make some joke about spyware
People will mock me for supporting child labor when I answer that I got my clothes from Shein while they’re decked out in Uniqlo and Nike
People regularly talk about their travel overseas in Africa with sadness that they’ll never be able to be civilized or democratic because they’re too poor. They talk about how suspicious and sketchy things are in South Asia/SEA while describing scenarios that are super normal and harmless, just culturally different
You don’t even know where I live, you don’t know what experiences I’ve had
I’m holding people up to 0 standards, it’s just that very little people meet the already in the ground bar that I have
Also, people I meet from non-Western countries pass that bar way, way more fucking often than Americans do. Even Canadians pass the bar significantly more often than Americans do. So no, I don’t try and see enemies everywhere I go
Don’t even for a second say that Americans are not one of the most xenophobic and racist people
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“one of us, one of us, one of us”
Me when the queer space is too white:
Me when the black space is too cishet:
Oof I felt this 😭
Why does this sound like it could be written by me (communist online but liberal irl because I’m deeply afraid of losing my comfort)
I’ve felt very similarly to you in the past tbh, I was usually able to handle it by just burying myself in my education in a field I felt was worthwhile. If you don’t have that option (not saying it wasn’t just delaying the problem) then perhaps you might have to develop the skill that is being your own friend.
It’s not a solution, but neither is wishing to go back to a time before you came to recognize the cruelty of the system you live in. But being able to amuse yourself with your own weirdness was really useful to me, and I think it made people like me more (though I could just be imagining it.)
This really resonates with me, thanks for sharing :)
But being able to amuse yourself with your own weirdness was really useful to me, and I think it made people like me more (though I could just be imagining it.
Especially this part. I noticed a tendency with my spouse where she tries to mask her weirdness even when she’s alone, and that causes me to notice the same thing with myself. We’re improving :)
That’s nice to hear, good to know I’m on some kinda wavelength
A) I too am lonely as fuck these last few years
B) The phrasing of your post made me think of this
I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
damn i really feel this
Get into birding. See if there’s an improv scene nearby. Do you have a micro cinema with really original programming? Board game store with a good community?
I’ve kinda felt this way at times too. Never fit in with groups because my interests were too niche/ common. Or I felt like a 5th wheel in the group if I talk too much. I agree that it can be discouraging to think about.
