• BodyBySisyphus [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
    7·
    4 hours ago

    I was wondering why I wasn’t getting any campaign texts and then I checked my spam and found this masterpiece:

    BodyBySisyphus, it’s Kamala Harris. I am turning to you because you are among my most dedicated supporters.

    Here’s the truth: The polls have tightened, the attack ads have intensified, and tonight marks the final end-of-month deadline of this election.

    I know it might seem like giving $5 or $50 with so little time left won’t make a difference, but we need you.

    Yada Yada yada give us your money

    I’m tickled by the implied self-own of calling me her most dedicated supporter

  • miz [any, any]@hexbear.netEnglish
    8·
    5 hours ago

    i am so fucking tired of this shit

    I hate getting the notifcation, hoping it’s someone I know who wants to talk to me, and intsead it’s always some liberal saying shit like I SERVED IN THE MILITARY AND I LOVE AMERICA HELP ME DEFEAT THE REPUBLICAN, like fuck you I hope you die screaming

    • miz [any, any]@hexbear.netEnglish
      5·
      4 hours ago

      I ran through the formalizer for “more passionate” and I like it:

      Every time that notification pops up, my heart races with anticipation, longing for a name I recognize, someone who truly cares about connecting with me. But instead, I’m met with the same tired, frustrating message—a stranger, some liberal ranting about how they served in the military and love their country, pleading for help to take down the Republicans. It infuriates me! I can’t help but want to scream in anguish, wishing they could feel the weight of my disdain. It’s exhausting!

  • UlyssesT [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
    26·
    8 hours ago

    If there’s an actual person texting you, tell them that you are actually two people sharing one phone, and that one of them only speaks lies, and one only tells the truth, and that the texter can ask one question to determine how you’re going to vote troll