I believe I generally understand the concept of the (trans, not Star Trek) usage of “The Prime Directive” but as a cis person, I don’t really seem to get why. If a person you know and are close to starts to act or talk in a way like they are possibly trans, why is it… not proper, for lack of a better term, to genuinely tell them “I think you might want to seriously explore these feelings”? It feels like you should? Like you should be reassuring to someone who feels like this?
In addtion to what everyone else has said, this is from the Gender Dysphoria Bible - even if you’re right, someone can’t be told their trans, it’s an internal thing
“ My good friend Lily coined the phrase “Egg Prime Directive” to describe the fact that trans people have an unspoken agreement not to tell people who are questioning their gender whether or not they are trans.
When someone is just told they are trans, that opens ground for denial; it activates defense mechanisms built by internalized transphobia, and it has a high probability of pushing them further into the closet, if not making them outright transphobic. Even when it doesn’t, it leaves ground for their own subconscious to reject their dysphoria, claiming that they were just manipulated or deceived. The much more effective strategy is to talk about your own experiences with dysphoria so that they see the common grounds and come to their own conclusion about their gender. The code doesn’t forbid helping them to explore their gender; it forbids assigning a gender to them. Or, to put it more succinctly, you cannot be told what the Matrix is; you can only be shown”
Exactly, you don’t want to force an identity on someone. If F1nnster says he’s a cis dude, you should respect that unless he decides otherwise. (Yes, I’m aware he’s out as genderfluid now.)