I know ive made post like this before, but I really do feel pretty defeated, I just dont look anything like my selfies to others, I look pretty awful to be honest, I weight 200 lbs and its been a struggle to loose weight, I know the solution is to see a dietation, and only stock my home with healthy foods and go to the gym maybe but the truth is I can’t really afford that and I dont feel like I can really cook until I move since my mom is kinda defensive over the kitchen. Ive struggled with binge for a while and I just look at photos other people take me and want go vomit, I look so awful. I look like zero months hrt dispite a bit over two years of hrt. My selfies only look okay cause of angles. People have also tried to convince my male fat will redistribute but I know that isn’t true and that it will stay until I get rid of it. Also I apologize for the grammer in this post, I’m writing this as I’m about to mentally explode.
I feel I can almost guarantee you look a lot better in everybody else’s eyes than you feel yourself. My mtf girlfriend constantly thinks about herself the same way you do, yet I know for a fact that not a single person who’s met her thinks she’s anything but a gorgeous, pretty girl - regardless of whether they know she’s trans. I know saying “don’t be so hard on yourself, nobody else thinks of you like this” probably doesn’t help because it usually doesn’t for my partner, but it’s still true.
I look okay in selfies, but in photos other people take of me I look like a different person, example here
1st photo, a not perfect but generally okay selfie in my book
https://imgur.com/a/AJvseNr
2nd Photo, a photo taken by family, a photo I hate.
https://imgur.com/a/EioFHIN
Aw, I think you are being too hard on yourself. The second photo is classic family photo layout (weird lighting, standing against a wall). But even in that one you have a cute face and really nice hair. You look like a perfectly nice person I would talk to at an event. :)
Losing weight is hard and takes time. And we all come in different sizes and shapes. I’ve been trying to focus on being healthy instead and reframe my mindset. Like, I’m going to take a walk or move every day because that is a really kind thing to do for my mental health and body versus I’m so fat and I need to suffer because I ate calories. Or, I’m going to learn some new recipes because I love my guts and want to give them nutrition. I don’t know. It’s not magic, but I think it’s helping. Maybe worth a try.
Yeah your right it is hard. I guess I am always worried I am gonna miss out on progress.
I hear you. I read atomic habits a few years ago (not a plug, but I think it’s a good book), and the author talked about building new habits and getting 1% better at something. And if you aim for that every day, it will compound over time to something much bigger. Some days you can take on the world. Other times showing up and doing one thing toward your goal is enough. As long as you are putting in the effort, that slow progress still counts (even if it feels frustratingly slow).
Yeah nah you look great in both photos! Everybody can look better from certain angles over others, but trust me as a random outside observer you look good in both photos :)