Please stop barking and lunging at other dogs, I promise you that if there is ever another dog that poses a threat to you, your mother, or myself I will lead the way in kicking the absolute shit out of them and you are welcome to join in if I do. I think you would have an absolute ball if you would just run and play with other dogs, you should give it a chance. You are a Malinois, you are smarter and more athletic than damn near any dog you will ever meet, they are no threat to you. We could go on a lot more hikes and bike rides and adventures to new places if you would just get over your issues with other dogs.

Please let me trim your nails, you don’t like when I do it, but you really don’t like when the vet tries to do it, so take the easier option, it’s also cheaper for us which means more money for us to spend on toys and treats.

Please stay out of the trash.

When I tug on the sheets, you don’t need to get out of bed, you just need to let me have some of the sheets. You are always welcome on the bed or on the couch with us, we will even contort ourselves to accommodate you, you just need to let us have some blankets.

I don’t think I need to tell her I love her, we can feel the reciprocal love between each other just fine, but any extra time we have I’d make sure that I spent it telling her that.