I’m marking this as NSFW because I’m not super sure if this counts as discussing dysphoria. I don’t exactly know a lot about this if I’m being entirely honest. Feel free to tell me if this would have been fine or not :)
I’ve always considered myself a cis dude. I feel relatively comfortable as a dude I think. But there’s a lot of stuff that has me wondering things. For example, like a year ago I told one of my friends “Being a man is cool and all, but if I was given the reins at character creation, I would have chosen to be a woman.” That friend told me that was not very cis of me to say, and I kinda just wrote it off, but I still hold to that take as the way I feel. When I am falling asleep and I’m sort of day dreaming, I choose to daydream about the adventures of a female character I’ve invented. When I play video games, I almost always choose the female option if it’s given, because I found it’s easier for me to get into the story that way.
However, I feel totally fine being a guy. So like I don’t know if I’m gaslighting myself here, one way or the other. It’s kinda a thing where there’s a possibility I might be trans, but if I were to actually do it, I can’t tell if my life would get better or worse. I don’t think I would feel safe being trans in my area of the world, for example. So it’s like sure I might have chosen the female build in the game of life, but that’s not what RNG gave me, and maybe I’m okay with that?
Honestly this hit me like a ton of bricks. Just last night I laid in bed going “he him she her he him she her” trying to figure out what I vibed with and felt like I was getting nowhere. But reading this and realizing that I can ask other people to refer to me with she/her had my hear beating fast and tears welling up and I felt super giddy.
I think you’re right. I think I might not have negative male thoughts, but positive female thoughts.
I have a safe and anonymous discord server I’m in and yeah I think I’m going to try experimenting. Wish me luck
New girl just dropped? Find out on the next episode
I am so happy you found some advice that really resonated with you. Good luck!![emoji trans-heart trans-heart](https://www.hexbear.net/pictrs/image/aec9b839-d11e-4611-9263-60a84384ac89.png)
[Annoying] You can also join the matrix chat!!![emoji nia-peace nia-peace](https://hexbear.net/pictrs/image/5b3dc061-53a6-47c8-942c-9c50f144a84b.png)