I’ve been doing martial arts for around 20 years now, and the main piece of advice I can give is that there is no shortcut to it. Expect to put in at least a couple of hours a week for six months to a year to become proficient. I would recommend finding a MMA, boxing, or kickboxing/Muay Thai school that has sparring practice. You learn by doing, and you need to experience what it’s like to fight an opponent to understand things like distancing and timing. Doing drills simply doesn’t translate into actual fighting skills. Stay away from any courses where they just run you through some techniques. These will not work the way you expect them to when you’re up against an uncooperative opponent.

Alternatively, you can look for a judo school if you want to learn grappling. However, in my opinion, it’s easier to become proficient at striking. You also generally do not want to go rolling on the ground in a real world situation. You don’t know what’s on the ground, and you’re fully committed at that point meaning that you won’t be able to disengage if things aren’t going your way. My view is that it’s better to learn striking first and supplement it with some grappling knowledge.

Ultimately, the best option is to avoid the fight if you can. You don’t know if the attacker has friends that could pile on, if they’re armed, and so on. Actually engaging in a fight is the absolute last resort.