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I really like this. I come at this from a more NSR than OSR perspective, but I feel like I wouldn’t go so far as to say that the difficulties of parleying and fighting should be matched - the situation is what it is. And even if not fighting is always the better choice, the players won’t know that and won’t always make the best choices.
I generally play these types of games with combat being what happens when things go wrong. Unless one side has a very clear advantage, combat is high risk for everyone involved and usually it’s better for everyone to avoid it. Combat happens, not because either the player characters or the NPCs would choose it as their first choice, but because you play games about situations in which everything is likely to go wrong.
This is all going to be more NSR
Cairn seems like an obvious one. It’s classic fantasy that will be pretty familiar to people, it has a good number of adventures as well as adventures for other systems that have been converted, and also all the rules are totally free.
Mausritter (modern, but nice) and liminal horror (modern, but horror) are also good. These are all Into the Odd games, there are a lot of hacks of this system for different settings and I feel like you can’t really go wrong there.
I’ll also recommend Fallen, especially for solo games. It’s more like gothic fantasy. It has some really good random tables. I use the oracle deck for other games all the time.