I now understand why Lemmy is called “link aggregator” software

I’ve never used object storage before, so I’m not even sure that’s the best approach for the use case. It makes sense when you need to access storage provided by a 3rd party in a standardized way, but perhaps it’s overkill when everything is self hosted. I wonder if folks have other ways to connect the application to remote storage that’s less “heavy.” That said, I will certainly dig into Minio, as it seems to be the best of breed. Thanks!

I guess there are a few -> https://geekflare.com/self-hosted-s3/

Thanks for your perspective. You are right that I was indeed acting like a hurt spouse. For a little clarity, one of our children was at work at the time I confronted her. We had to wait about 90 min for him to come home. So, she had that time to think about what she was going to say, it wasn’t so immediate as I made it seem.

For added clarity, I don’t have mixed feelings, I feel very confident that I did the right thing here. But I recognize that we don’t always see everything from our own perspective, so I sought to broaden my view. You helped provide a perspective I couldn’t see, so thank you. I was also hoping to provide a good topic for a rich post on Lemmy that would spur some participation and discussion. I’m glad so many are providing their opinions.

Oh yes, she’s entitled alright. Lawyers got involved. The laws here are very clear. She walks away with half of everything, plus 20% of my income for the next 14 years. The thanks I get for working hard to support her for 25 years so she could have an easier life. She won’t need money, and I won’t have any left to take

Thank you so much. A lot of great points here. Thanks for taking the time

In retrospect, I am glad she didn’t have a chance to spin her own story. She totally would have

Thanks for the well worded response. I tried to walk a line for the last two years between helping they stay connected with her, and not wanting to have anything to do with her. I wouldn’t force them, but I would do things all together “as a family” just to keep them spending some time together. I think it was easier for them if I was there as a buffer, and harder when they are just with her.

Yes, it took me a bit to realize how they would later view my withholding it. At the time I was really only thinking that they had a right to know why this was happening. Thanks

Thanks for your response. She did have a right to stay, and if she had asked to, I would have had no choice. In fact about a week later we made a brief attempt at reconciliation, and quickly came to the conclusion that it wouldn’t work. She then voluntarily packed up and left for good.

Thanks for that perspective, appreciate the response

I’m sorry that happened. My parents divorced when I was a baby, and I was closer to my dad than my mom. Much later I learned about things that hurt to know, like the fact that my dad beat my mom up so bad she was in the hospital for days. It’s tough learning bad things about people you love. Best to you

I’ve actually been kind of a broker in keeping them connected. The 4 of us were still doing things together, usually at my suggestion, despite my not wanted to see her, so that they would. I tried hard to keep them connected and keep their relationships from falling apart. My thanks is that she more or less robbed me in the divorce, taking as much as she could. She’s on her own with the kids now, I never want to see her again. They do still spend some time together. Both the kids understand that she is their only mom and always will be.

Yeah, they’d wonder and ask for sure. Also, I believe that when they inevitably would learn about it, they’d be upset with me for withholding it from them

Ah it didn’t occur to me that mods at various instances may be removing individual comments. Can an instance moderate the individual thread comments of a community from another instance? I was thinking that federating with another instance meant all that instance’s threads and comments would be available to your users in turn. If that’s not the case, then the only way for a user to be sure to get all of a community’s content is view it from that community’s home server

Having multiple communities in different instances for the same topic is a controversial topic that I haven’t yet settled on an opinion about. However, what I’m talking about here is that the content for the same community shows different across various instances. That seems very broken to me

I understand how instances that don’t federate with another instance won’t show content, but I’ve checked a bunch of instances. Could it be that beehaw, lemmy.one, reddthat, lemm.ee, and feddit.de have all defederated from lemmy.world? They all have a different mix of content

Here is their post about it:

https://beehaw.org/post/567170

Yeah I saw that about beehaw, so that’s not unexpected. It’s actually what prompted me to look at how the community appears differently there, and then to look at how it appears elsewhere. Pick any lemmy instance and look at the sysadmin.world community from it, and it looks different than lemmy.world. I just looked at https://reddthat.com/c/sysadmin@lemmy.world/ and there too it only shows 6 comments.

Pick any community and any number of instances and look at the community from several instances, and I see differences. I thought federation would make the same content show everywhere that is federated.

If you port forward to your Pi, only your Pi will be exposed. But, if your Pi gets pwned, it can in turn attack anything next to it. Safest is to isolate the Pi on it’s own subnet or a DMZ if your router has the functionality.

Of note, many home ISPs block standard server ports like 80 and 443. You might need to use non standard ports like 8080 and 8443