Now that I’ve caught you with the clickbait title,

Basically every post has included some form of toxic self-hate, minus one or two mentioning exercise. While I do like being able to confront these in the first place, the purported goals and name of this community gives people who are giving the exact wrong advice far too much credibility, and the last thing these people need is a comment with the most upbears regurgitating individualistic self-help concepts at them.

If we’re going to keep this sort of community around, I suggest doing some serious research and basing it off of DBT, and integrating serious critiques of CBT style mental healthcare and improvement.

I am just some random nerd who is terrible at self-improvement at general, so I understand taking this with some serious doubt. But I just had to get this off my chest.

Thank you, WithoutFurtherBelay

  • WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.netOPEnglish
    6·
    10 months ago

    I agree they shouldn’t call others dipshits, but generally what I think people need is actionable advice. I understand the desire to help, and it’s always good, we just all have to do serious work digging the bootstraps mentality out of our brain

    • Mokey [none/use name]@hexbear.netEnglish
      7·
      10 months ago

      Agreed, or atleast know when they’re not helpful or when to just show support/commiseration. I think there’s also some degree of you gotta go and do it (it being non-specific towards anyone, im not talking about anyone specifically) and that’s truly tough love that some people will need.

      When I complain about my music stuff not going well and someone who doesn’t know me tells me to just go do it, i literally am already doing it, that’s appropriate time to get mad at that kind of advice. i think also recognizing when you’re truly at a dead end is an appropriate time to get mad.

      • WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.netOPEnglish
        5·
        10 months ago

        I think there’s also some degree of you gotta go and do it (it being non-specific towards anyone, im not talking about anyone specifically) and that’s truly tough love that some people will need.

        You know what’s funny is that this is kind of true, but I think if it needs to be done repeatedly or for something someone clearly wants to do a lot already, it implies a more fundamental blocking factor which I guess is one of my more important points I’m trying to make.