Basically, my question involves to what extent I should obey my parents as an anarchist. I’m breaking their trust right now by writing this. Basically, in a long series of events that’s lasted my entire life, they’ve come to think that I’m obsessed with going on the computer, and recently with computer privacy and security. They only let me on the computer for school related purposes. Should I do what they say? I feel an anarchist might have a different answer about this. I feel like we’ve just been getting along so well lately, and we would all cry if they found out I broke their trust, but, on the other hand, child liberation? I’m really confused.
Hello!
first of all i think it is kind of normal to not always do what parents say. I have done that and many other childs also did not do everything what parents say. in this case, for instance, your desire to explore the internet and other opinions that are different to your parents opinions is very natural to get to know what your real opinion on things is.
However, as an adult person thinking about my youth, i can say that my parents were sometimes correct in saying things but their strong opinion felt smothering. As a parent, trying to protect their children is also natural and they probably try to do best. for instance, in my youth and also now as an adult i have spend many many hours in front of an computer and it is definitely not healthy, but not using modern technology (like the internet and computers for private stuff) is probably also bad.
I guess your parents have included in their argumentation things like “life experience” by saying school is important and you should learn more or something? In part this is correct, your life will be probably easier with good grades and good education. However, the education in many states is also not that great (except when you have great teachers, that can sometimes change things), but still you need to make your own experiences. But even when the education system is bad, it still can be a useful lesson to take. Because when you are an adult your life will also consist of some things which you cannot avoid so training that skill is useful.
So in essence, i completely feel you. Breaking the trust of parents doesn’t feel good when you like your parents and like being trusted. And the anarchist perspective would be for me that trust has two sides. Your parents obviously trust you but i think your parents miss that they have to earn your trust. In typical parent-child relationships, i think most parents completely miss the points that the childs loose trust of too much authority is used. Because sometimes parents have good reasons for their thinking but they force their thinking onto their childs without explaining carefully the reasons. However, i think parents also have in many cases not the time or the will power to explain those things because they have to work a lot.