This is specially helpful if you have a keyboard-cat who loves to type gibberish. The temperament of the cat is pretty critical, so if you have a cat who already highly values human attention, this is a great behavior to teach because you’re literally just teaching them to meet their needs in a way that is most comfortable and enjoyable for both of you.

Things you will need:

  • a cat that doesn’t hate you/humans in general and ideally one that already regularly seeks human attention and just doesn’t know how to do it in a way you enjoy.
  • an Altoids tin or other small hard-sided container (so they can’t chew through it!)
  • cat treats (mine loves temptations and they come in bulk sizes which is great for training)
  • a pomodoro or excersice timer or app (I used this one)
  • Optional: a training clicker. Personally, I just pick a specific phrase in a tone of voice I never use outside of training. I don’t like clickers because I always misplace them, so I just say “good kitty!” in a high pitched voice. The most important thing is that it sounds just about the same every time and you never say it that way or in that tone at any other time.

Each of these steps should occur in 5, 10, or 15 minute sessions spaced out to 1, 2, or 3 times a day depending on your cat’s motivation and attention span. Too long or too often will make the cat less willing to participate/learn.

Step 1 - Set Up: Prepare the space and decide on a reward sound (clicker or specific phrase/tone). Fill the small hard-sided container and leave it on the desk (or coffee table if your regular sitting area is a couch). Make sure the treats you have chosen are desirable to the cat by holding them out and seeing if the cat is willing to hop up and move at least a few feet to come get it. You may have to try a few different types of treats to find one the cat really wants.

Step 2 - Get them onto your lap: Introduce the cat to your lap. Closed spaces that they didn’t pick out on their own can be stressful for a cat, so maybe start with both feet on the ground and your back straight against the chair (don’t tuck your knees up or lean forward). If they are ok with being picked up, you can just set them on your lap. If they don’t like being picked up, lure them onto your lap with the treat. The moment they are on your lap, use the reward phrase and provide the treat.

Step 3 - Make the lap a rewarding place to stay: if they stay longer than 3-5 seconds, give them another treat. Steadily move this up to 5-15 seconds.

Step 4 - Extend the amount of time on your lap it takes to receive a reward: This is where the interval timer comes in. I started at 30 seconds, but I could see someone needing to start at 10-15 seconds for a cat that doesn’t like human attention as much. Every time the interval beeper goes off, provide a treat.

Step 5 - Keep extending the time: I increased by about 15 seconds each session, but again, my cat was very motivated by human attention. You may need to reduce the time increases to 5-10 seconds. You may find that you can only extend this period to 5-10 minutes without a treat, but my cat likes human attention a lot so she was very happy to learn my preferred cuddle method because it meant she could get more cuddles.

Step 6 - Switch from treats to a preferred petting style (if possible): My cat really likes a single finger stroking her cheeks, but others might like behind the ear or top of the head scritchies, under the chin, or even along the back (although along the back is often overstimulating and a trigger for nibbles/noms). Start alternating the treats with the preferred petting style, then you can (possibly) eliminate the treats altogether if they’re a very human-social cat.

Hope this is fun and enjoyable for you all!