We’ve handled an “exodus” before (they go back to Reddit in the end no matter how much they criticise it), we’ve handled trolls, we’ve handled DDoS attacks, they can’t bring anything we haven’t seen before.
But before this, liberal Borg/Collective has not moved like this across the internet overnight. The network effect can be overwhelming, and there will be leaks like the user who got ratio’d below. It is best to have an understanding of these other instances popping up, as there are about 10-12 major Lemmy instances now.
I do gauge myself on the redpill/blackpill part of the spectrum. And I do need to investigate, but it is not easy. But I think it is worth it.
I will not pretend I just pretended everything I said here, because these are indeed my current beliefs. But I will admit I wanted this engagement in comments, to be able to hear the leftist side of things to learn more, since I have watched enough content from the centrist/conservative entities I mentioned. There is now something more for me to ponder over.
I have a question: why is there no guide or recommendations for these kind of topics, the way I make guides for digital privacy? I do have an answer for it in the form of social engagement being a circus, no matter which camp, but it may not be a sufficient answer. Also, anti-imperialism is a large focus of the communist struggle.
Since you head this instance, I do want to tell it is not that I was salty about the ban, but about being called a misogynist with no dialogue exchange. Although most people will not want to consider other POVs unlike me, or are merely outing themselves by mistake, so I think there needs to be a consideration not just for gauging to ban someone, but to have a dialogue. I created this dialogue, nobody wanted to have it with me. And all of you that are talking to me, are doing so because there is a shared trust considering my year long history here, and because some recognise my tech privacy work. I think gauging people needs a lot more work.
Ping @muad_dibber@lemmygrad.ml and other admins for the last paragraph
True but also not having a spine, and accepting every point made as universal truths set in stone is highly wrong. Discussion, until it can be had, allows that tug of war between ideas that decide what falls apart.
Not all that I said can be handwaved, but I do see many points being made here being valid so I can refine whatever I learn.
According to researchers, the 23 percent of participants who only had sex with their spouse prior to getting hitched reported higher quality marriages versus those who had other past sexual partners as well.
I think this has got more to do with sexually frustrated men and women carrying out their dark thoughts, breaking down, healing themselves to become better men and women, ending up becoming more satisfied, since at this point they are over their internal frustration and possibly traumatic issues. Sexual act does serve as a venting outlet.
I will process more diverse literature on this subject, but time is going to tell a lot of things. I do not think society is headed down a very bright path, and we are about to see highly turbulent times which will affect both sexes.
I will keep a cool head and consume multiple sources instead of looking it as a way to deprogram, atleast this is what I can conclude. I am in no way righteous, but I think this is a subject where nobody has correct views. Social interaction goes so deep that even the most experienced extroverts get thrown off regularly.
Why is one country demographic so limiting in this case, when USA’s per capita PPP is extremely high? I would instead argue USA’s cultural westernisation effect carries over to almost all countries sufficiently for this study to be valuable.
You think alcohol and drug abuse leads to a healthy life? It is a sign of deep internal instability. Why can you not see it comes down to these people hating the concept of committing to a partner, using each other like meat, thus revealing personality issues and internalised horrible ideas of how a society should be?
I never said it was necessarily depression. Substance abuse and alcohol abuse clearly is shown there. The concept of pair bonding is true to an extent, depending on how loyal people are. People engaging in casual sex are not loyal or committing people.
I forgot to supplement this with another study, a mistake I will correct now.
And in the same breath, I would recommend this one as well. https://web.archive.org/web/20220124003810/https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stability/
Why is polygamy (or in your words promiscuity) inherently worse than monogamy?
The only issues are not limited to verbal acceptance and consent. There is something post that.
The social player thing is not just a woman problem, in fact I’d say it’s worse coming from men. As another commenter said, men do that shit all the time and only when women start to engage in similar behaviors does it become a problem. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with holding certain values for yourself, I myself could never be a social “player” (meaning casually sleeping around, if I’m interpreting that right)
Men can be really aggressive thanks to testosterone, and women are nurturing and the birthgivers of human society. This forms a very large basis behind the social constructs that are binary gender roles we have today, that have remained stagnant since centuries. Biochemistry does not change, our scientific and social understanding grows as humans.
Social player in the way I say means man/woman who plays around with multiple relationship partners, not necessarily having casual sex, but exploiting them for monetary or social validation favours, although in many cases, casual sex is a factor.
I threw myself out here to see the responses I get, so I can read them, and if there are any good recs, which I think is the most important quality of a true leftist – self-critique. I am not sure if I want to stick around because I did not like how I was called a misogynist, silenced for 4 days, and that just made me feel miserable for what are conflicting views and not necessarily Tate-ist ideas.
I do not think the reality is this simple. There is not a speck of doubt that misogyny has existed in society, but men have had their share of inequalities, like being the only demographic group to be conscripted during wars or emergency (includes current Russian SMO), men being the dominant group to be in military or in any dangerous factories or industrial facilities, men never having had an equivalent brotherhood like women have sisterhood throughout the times, men mostly never being given child custody in a broken marriage, and so on.
Moreover, women overwhelmingly prefer traditionalism once they are post 30s, and feminists actively cherrypick traditionalist roles to conform to, despite the general notion being advertised as destroying traditional societal roles. How would you categorise this as, women being okay with misogyny as it benefits them in long term, or women being unfaithful to feminist movement, or feminist movement derailed in some capacity and/or by within itself, or some other explanation?
Regarding polygamy, there is a study that many people will not like. I do not think it is healthy, and just because something has been done eternally, does not mean it is correct to continue doing. Is that not what breaking down the medieval ideas, that still exist in society as it is, all about?
I will try to skim through that literature, thanks for the rec.
monogamy
but it’s immediately clear from your writing that you don’t hold them only for yourself but you hold those positions as normative and when you communicate you impose that position on the world.
Explain to me why is polygamy healthier for either of the sexes. In case of women, abusively having sex means personal issues and inability to spiritually bond with future partners, as the “threshold” for satisfaction becomes higher with every partner. In case of men, it simply means an incredible lack of emotion and an internalised hatred towards self and women (extreme conservative views from medieval era play a large role in shaping this idea).
I don’t even think masculinity is a real thing, I think it’s a social construct that has a history, that is to say, it’s a trope or a meme. […] And when you look at the similarities, they are usually the similarities that go along with reinforcing structures of oppression and the rest is just accidental historical window dressing.
Window dressing has been an incredible problem contributing to the worldview shaping. And by calling masculinity a social construct, that allows for everything to be called a social construct, throwing the basis of society’s survival and existence to date out of the window. I do not think this is wise, and in that capacity I disagree. Conservatives act like its still the fucking 18th century, and the other end of the spectrum likes to act that sex is a cheap act and just a venting outlet for other issues, so it is both justified, and in line with the oversexualisation of mass media, so its “normal”.
This does not make you not misogynistic, just like having a black friend doesn’t make you not racist. Also, the idea that being chivalrous is somehow not misogynistic is completely mistaken. Chivalry is literally derived from the word for knight, and we can pretty clearly see how the entire of medieval European society was misogynistic
I did not mean to use it as an escape jail card. But I think it is rare enough that I can use that phrasing legitimately. Chivalry can be interpreted as misogynistic, because of binary gender norms playing into the equation, but I do not think being respectful and courteous is the same as that. Good and nice men exist, and most of them become toxic either because of extreme conservatism (what I try to avoid) or fuckboys/fuckgirls rewarding the wrong behaviours in society.
Monogamy is found throughout the animal world, as is polygamy. Neither is better or worse. The belief that one is generally better or worse is problematic.
We are not animals with nothing else to do than chew on grass/meat and breed like rabbits. Humans have more than just intuition and intelligence. Humans have intellect that distinguishes them from animals. This is not pedanticism.
I want to know what is so misogynistic about traditional views like women often dating for free food
This isn’t a traditional view. This is a false belief. No one has ever dated me for free food. No one I know has I ever dated anyone for free food. No one I know has ever talked about their friends dating someone for free food
I strongly disagree. Freeloading exists significantly. I have no idea what to say if you think this does not exist. Women do it for two reasons – food, and being able to share selfies from lavish hotels on Instagram/Snapchat for social media validation.
I want to know what is so misogynistic about traditional views like Western feminism not being a true representation of feminism, and how much it currently harms mainly men, and creating polarisation between both sexes
Also not a traditional view. This is a full on reactionary view. Feminism does not harm men. Feminism does not create polarization between the sexes. The polarization between men and women is quite literally the history of class society for millennia.
I want you to watch what goes on in this debate on Jubilee. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOUGNGWmN0k (note: no side likes Derrick, the yellow jacket incel, feel free to ignore that idiot)
Feminism, atleast on Western side of the movement, actively seeks to not just harbor, but has also been harming men. Plenty cases of false shaming men in public and in gyms, actively misinterpreting and targeting MRA, and other issues exist.
I saw the boyslockerroom/girlslockerroom case last year in India, on Twitter, during the 3 days that it happened. The girls who faked Snapchat chats on boys allegedly discussing women in a nasty manner, caused one boy to commit suicide one day after feminists started screaming on Twitter, and how women’s police commission must take action on the boy. The girl who fabricated it for social views is free, active on social media and doing whatever she wants. Men’s lives get destroyed in a snap upon accusations these days.
I want to know what is so misogynistic about traditional views psychology of dominance and submission in relationships factoring into the stability of any long term relationships, including marriage
You don’t see what’s so misogynistic about believing that men must dominate women to establish a long-term relationship? Really?
I know what you are saying, and this is why I mentioned it, knowing an obvious response will come to it, and I have no problems saying that what you are saying is correct. But this has a lot to do with biochemistry. Ever seen women who gym and eat a lot of meat, or take testosterone? Ask them or read their testimonies of how they start thinking and acting aggressively. Testosterone causes anyone to be aggressive, which is why men have fought wars, done the physically stressful jobs and acted dominant in relationships and in society. Women being the nurturing caretaker is not some idea that was born out of “toxic mindset”, but rather the simple fact that we are biologically designed in a way that woman is more sensitive, physically vulnerable and due to lack of testosterone, not as aggressive, the way a man is.
I do not think self critique is necessarily part of being a communist, but it is a mark of being a true leftist, which is why I put myself up here for perhaps what might be one of the most controversial posts on here.
Where did you get your ideas about how dating works? Also, you mentioned that some conservative/centrist dating advice has value. What takeaways did you get from them that you found valuable?
Matthew Hussey, Kevin Samuels mainly. For a wider view on society, I like to watch J-Hall and Whatever podcast, not necessarily absorbing everything said on there. There is a point to be made that it mostly covers Western society, but then most of society is heavily influenced by western ideas of socialisation, and since I live in India, I already know what the extreme conservative end looks like.
Whatever podcast has 4-5 hour podcasts that are diverse enough to have a Chinese girl who told mainland is heavily conservative (like India) and has double standards, where if a woman slept with more than one man, she would be called a slut, whereas it would not matter for the man.
What, do you think we treat radfems like comrades or something? Lmfao no.
That clarifies one point, thanks.
Sure, some could have a few traits as mentioned above (only human after all, and some humans are scummy regardless of gender); but to say all women are like that is straight up falling towards Incel/MGTOW territory.
I never said all women. I do not engage in liberal/fascist generalisation behaviours like that. However, many women in urban areas do have one or more of these behaviours, thanks to the incredible amount of sexualisation of mass media creating construed images of reality in womens’ heads.
traditional views like monogamy instead of promiscuity are better
Very, very interesting how rather than using polygamy, you used promiscuity though.
Yes, I wanted to gauge a reaction on this. Polygamy is harmful for both sexes and for society as a whole. I want to cover this bit in the next part where you made a massive generalisation.
You men can get away with bedding lots of women and society barely bats an eye. It’s only when women do the same that you guys start seething.
Let me tell you a few things. Women are the gatekeepers of relationships, which includes sexual relations. If a woman says no, man will go home. And these “you men” are not all men, but probably the 10% fuckboys that engage with a lot of misled women, again, thanks to oversexualisation of mass media. This happens mostly during post teenage years upto early 30s for both sexes.
Another point I want to make is that a woman is considered purer than men for the single most important reason – she has the womb and she has to be in a healthy state to carry the baby. Woman is the one who will procreate, not the man. I know that the fuckboys/fuckgirls rationalisation is imbalanced, which is precisely why I think sex is a sacred thing, and it is not meant to be abused by anyone. Obsession with sex, drugs et al is bad for a valid reason.
Chivalry is dead. Good men never get rewarded with healthy relationships in society, until an arranged marriage in most cases has to happen. Good women either are corrupted by mass media, or get tired of the incredibly conservative families they live in, and end up marrying people they do not inherently truly love.
social code being different for men and women
Are these set in stone, huh? So much for being a fucking leftist if you believe in this regressing shit.
There are certain social codes for men and women that are simply going to exist, unless bizarre things like artificial wombs come into existence, erasing the codependency of man and woman. Yes, there are things that can be improved on both ends, and it is a very long conversation.
What, did you had like bad experiences with women in the past that made you develop these thoughts? Or is it the fact that you got exposed to misogynist youtubers
No bad experiences made me develop particular thoughts. However, one feminist whose friend I loved back in college, did tell me that my self improvement did not matter to anyone, and tried to rage bait me as well. That solidified my thoughts on liberals and not women.
I never watched Tate or Shapiro or the likes, but I try to watch a healthy mix of content, mostly averaging as moderate on the spectrum. Matthew Hussey, Kevin Samuels, J-Hall and Whatever podcast. I keep a very tight hold on what views are shared there, selectively discarding anything that goes too conservative. These tubers are not incels or MGTOW, but closer to a mix of redpill/blackpill, mostly hovering around centre or centre-right.
It was the first date for OP. There can be women you mention, and they are the ones that do not want to play around. But a lot of women in the dating space do like to play around, either for night outs, free meals, socialising, or whatever reason.
You need not follow the word of nutjobs and cultists to follow conservative/moderate advice on masculinity. Kevin Samuels is a good one, he died recently. I just think they have a good hold of traditionalism, and a lot of those elements hold a lot of value that allows countering a lot of “Western feminism” elements I do not agree with.
It brings with it a host of issues like reliably hosting server, choosing to and having multiple servers or not, these servers being offsite and not at your home, maintaining logs, maintaining the self hosted service as well, in case of it being rented VPS how to manage anonymous payments, and so on.
Getting a good VPN provider’s subscription is preferred for this reason.
I hate to be a shill, but r/privatelife, what I created years ago out of frustration from r/privacy and the usual mainstream privacy subreddits. You can take a look yourself at whatever I have written being basically the only large scale vigilante acts in privacy community in the past years.
For very crude and deep stuff you could take a look at Shadow Wiki for stuff like HAM Radio (USA related). We have been friends for few years, since we are darknet aficionados.
For VPNs, r/VPN offered me to become a partner, but I found their affiliate linkings not very confidence inducing, so I just prefer r/VPNTorrents. No partnership.
PrivacyGuides is one of the most harmful groups out there as far as their moderation goes. Its head Jonah stole off $10000 ($17,500 in all) PTIO donations and put it into his private account, they seized PTIO subreddit which is locked to this day, they made a malicious GrapheneOS figurehead Tommy a moderator immediately after he published a faux hitpiece on me (which trended on PG for a month), and they protect toxic GrapheneOS devs/mods fervently to promote Google and Apple (mods/heads all are American/Canadian nationalists).
You can find more here, and upon reading comments in here: https://old.reddit.com/r/u_lo________________ol/comments/1314x2x/why_did_i_do_this/ji5l5uz?context=300
Also their advice regarding ProtonVPN is nonsense. They just regurgitate the common notions of privacy community and are thus a useless entity. You will hear the correct advice from one of us people who are deep into this stuff. The current VPN picks are Mullvad, IVPN and AirVPN, and Windscribe a close second, with OVPN being a distant third (got bought by Pango/HotspotShield recently), and the rest are far below.
Edit: I see someone is downvoting me even here… I wonder if its just an ignoramus here, or is it witch hunting taken to another extreme…
Its good to see that defederation is being taken care of. I have often tried to point out instances over at main Lemmy instance over the years, knowing how trolls attempt circumvention of blockades. I remember my days memeing and trolling on Discord years ago for fun sakes (mostly anime/gacha groups). Knowing how the troll mindset works is so beneficial to combat it.
Keep putting in the minimal effort. It is enough to keep them at bay, and even to make some pop a few veins.
Give or take few months at best from Ukraine’s POV. Anglo empire cannot supply, plus they want to try out their last ditch at China before 2025 by using Taiwan, so a resource focus shift means immediate collapse of what is left of Ukraine.
We could also see some activity in Malaysia, Phillipines and Thailand. Japan is also being coaxed to rearm like “old” days.
Since my comment got sucked into the vortex…
Nobody has managed to think it is bait PR to gain more attention, and a way to get rid of blackboard screechers and whiners who whine about Matrix. They are selling encrypted messaging, NOT messages. They are selling a free service to governments for the commercial moniker.
Very based in winters if you can do it. In winters I try to keep water as cold as 16°C, where outside temperature is 12-15°C. As an Indian, being a tropical country, cold showers are harder than me than for Westerners in Northern Hemisphere, for example. This makes it even more beneficial for me, and for those living in tropical or equatorial countries.
Last winters that went by, I could not keep the water as cold (22°C) compared to the past 4 years before it, most likely due to contracting Omicron twice that affected my great immunity against cold weather. However I developed it back again, by discovering my love for soup and noodles in winters. I purposely avoided medication for the most part, and relied heavily on soups, warm milk and noodles to let my body fight by itself.
Cold showers have insane effects, and I learnt it from NoFap (one of the only good advices there) when I was in that community 6-7 years ago. It is no pseudoscience, and cold showers really make you superhuman-like.
GrapheneOS is something you want to stay away from. Recently they screamed hoax about a CP spammer in their chats from CalyxOS community, and how he got a swatting attempt from them. He has presented no evidence of it, it has been a week now.
This developer has issues and has lied a dozen of times at this point about various things in the past years.
https://reddit.com/r/u_lo________________ol/comments/1314x2x/why_did_i_do_this/
I am a mod of c/privacy at main Lemmy instance, and his group chat mods did this against me last year, similarly threatening with Canadian police stuff. https://archive.ph/acy2h Also forgot to mention how they hijacked the Lemmy c/privacy Matrix room, banned me off and repurposed it for Lemmy.ca instance. Admins did not help me against that Yayannick traitor and those GrapheneOS minions.
Also, he and his acolytes have called Bromite and FlorisBoard developers very colourful epithets.
The Bromite drama stems from a CalyxOS developer submitting a PR for Bromite. Since Daniel hates CalyxOS with a passion, it gets pretty messy. Pop some popcorn, then see these links:
https://github.com/bromite/bromite/pull/2102#issuecomment-1155760155
https://github.com/bromite/bromite/issues/2141
The Florisboard drama was caused by the Florisboard developer backing out of their partnership due to Daniel’s weird behavior when it came to Bromite:
http://web.archive.org/web/20220803142758/https://github.com/florisboard/florisboard/issues/1921
The only arguments you can use legitimately are that:
boosters cause harm, weakening the body beyond its ability to deal with the antibodies generated using first two doses. This is a well vetted effect, causing many countries to mandate only the initial two doses. The first two doses are ample to develop resistance against all variants of COVID except for the harmless Omicron variant as it stands (which even ended up spreading in China).
the effectiveness of USA/UK made vaccines was purposely inflated in media for profit generating purposes, compared to Indian/Chinese/Russian vaccines. In the end, Indian and Chinese inactivated strain based vaccines have been the safest with just as high effective rate.
we all saw the nonsense USA and Western countries claimed about origins of COVID being manmade in China. Later, the Lancet commission report debunked it with 2 years of research, and western media was quick to call them a “shameful” organisation.
Lockdowns have been very much effective in containing the spread and decreasing the fatality presented by Alpha, Delta and Delta plus variants. It is the key difference between USA suffering ~10 million deaths while China saved ~15 million lives. (Obviously people partying at beaches and clubs instead of making lockdown effective is the core reason, besides misinformation people calling it a flu, which could perhaps only be said about Omicron variant practically.)
I do not consider liberal centrist weasels as leftists. They may have some societal overlaps with leftists but by and large liberalism has properties that clearly contradict socialism, how it stands today. How I think is liberalism/centrism is simply a populist chameleon on the political scale, and whatever is the dominant working mode of production and foundational mechanism of society, it will shapeshift to it. Liberalism has no spine, no morals and no principles. Liberalism is a hollow shell, one can stuff it up with whatever one wants.
Not yet read the materials, mainly because of the whole Reddit exodus thing that will be going on for a while. I have to think what to do with my privacy subreddit. I will take time to participate here unless I can fully accept where I stand on the social slider, because I am protective towards this space even if I may have to leave. I did pursue other methods into seeing redpill arguments and Jubilee YT channel middle ground debates related to alphamale/beta/feminism and such.