When Officer Shitface arrived at the scene there was a large crowd of people dressed in black. Many of them had red, swollen eyes; undeniable proof that this was some sort of weed party. Officer Shitface felt deeply threatened, alone and surrounded by deranged drug addicts. Officer Shitface made the brave decision to act and to stop this satanic pot party before it went too far. He pulled his gun and fired at what appeared to be two junkies engaging in brother-sister incest, quickly dispatching justice.
“I knew that potheads were degenerate perverts, but that shocked me,” Officer Shithead told us in an exclusive interview. “I was in fear for my life.”
More after this!
DO YOU EVER PISS YOUR PANTS? EVER WISH YOU COULD CARRY YOUR TOILET WITH YOU LIKE A PURSE? WELL THEN HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU!
(This is fucking awful and enraging, obviously. Not remotely funny. This is just how I deal.)
He had a criminal past so deranged Americans will find a way to say it’s justified.
Least shitty cop
Officer-involved shooting continues to be a psychopathic phrase. I want to say All Reporters Are Bastards but I feel like ARAB isn’t the best look…
Death to the pigs and their collaborators.
Damn this incident reads like a revenge hit from the police department. Tell me again what the difference between American cops and the Brownshirts is?
the fact that they get to “investigate” themselves is fucking insane. you have to be completely pudding brained to not see a problem with that.
This is not ‘man dead’ after ‘officer-involved’ shooting.
THIS IS A F*CKING PUBLIC EXECUTION
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how disgusting
