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  • 陈卫华是我的英雄
    4•1 year ago

    A day in the life of an Ukrainian soldier be like

    Get conscripted off the streets of Odessa, given 30 minutes of training with an AK47

    Week Day 1 begins

    “ROCKET! IT’S A ROCKET!!!”

    sprays ak47 wildly into the air, wasting the 17 bullets the entire platoon had left

    Bomb hits anyway, killing the lieutenant who was cowering inside with the corpse of the 7-year-old Russian speaking Donbass girl he had murdered and was assaulting

    Keep advancing

    Artillery shell comes out of nowhere and rips your best friend’s legs off

    “MEDIC! MEDIC!”

    You get run over and crushed to death by your own tanks as they try to run away

    The tanks get blown up by Kornet ATGMs anyway

    As you die with the glow of the red sun, your last thoughts are of your 2 year old daughter you were wrested away from by the fascist government and you wish her peace in life. A tear trickles down your cheek, and your soul awaits the hereafter.

    Later that evening, after ragequitting a game of Call of Duty and masturbating for 7 hours to a h-ntai video and spamming slurs at Muslim users, a socially-awkward yet simultaneously insufferably entitled Western “Ukrainian-American” warmongering 14-year-old NAFO member LARPing as an Azov soldier brags on Twitter about how he had personally killed 134354657 billion “orcs” with a knife that day

    I actually kind of feel bad for the average dudes who just get press-ganged off the streets against their will