The time of grave is long and painful, after a few weeks I seem to forget things I knew of people, I wonder if after that while I’ll forget everyone who seemed important to me, or if the living will forget every bit of me, that’s why I wouldn’t like to be reborn again death cuts you off from where you’ve been and suddenly rexisting after 200 years of death will bring you to another stop where no one knows you and you know no one, only left is you to know yourself someone not all of us know.
After a while of being born and dying a person becomes desensetized to both and all of their weights. The less you become invested and no longer enjoy life or aim for the better, I guess our short lives push us into doing things we would delay making the best of what we have.
If we reached our lives limit and we knew our death’s time, not announcing before is just a pain to walk between who and who knowing that you’ll never see them again when they don’t, walking past them when said is also a guilt of being a liar, a deterrence.
I don’t like having weight on my chest (except if the weight is my boobs) and neither do I want it on others, this is not a call for help nor a lap to cry on, I’ll be back by July.
I am very late since I myself took an uncalled hiatus for few weeks, but if this is anything related to mental health, take your time and come back. None of us have infinite time, so we must make use of it as and how needed.